Give up your inquiries which are completely useless, and consider these words a second warning.

Jimmy Page--GQ Men of the Year--Rock God — Sure, you can ask Jimmy Page about all the groupies and drugs and why Robert Plant seems like such a standoffish dick, but he might throw a television at you. (And then give an answer that's as awesome as it is unexpected.)

Should Free Office Food Be Taken Home? — My company offers certain food items free in our office pantry. Every morning, my co-worker Brandon eats a serving of Cheerios from the pantry while getting settled for the day. Would it be acceptable for him to take the cereal home the night before and eat it before going to the office?

The Standout First-Year Commissioner — The NBA's most impressive floor general is a six-foot-three Duke graduate who hasn't played competitive hoops in decades. He is Adam Silver, the first-year commissioner whose decisive performance thus far has made his veteran counterpart in the NFL look even more inept by comparison.

Sorry, No One’s Sitting There — When my wife and I go to the movies, I typically buy a third reserved seat so I can keep the seat next to me empty. I prefer - but by no means need, either physically or psychologically - the extra space. My wife finds this new habit of mine rather absurd and extravagant.

A Decade of Curious People and Dangerous Ideas — Chuck Klosterman IV: A Decade of Curious People and Dangerous Ideas by Chuck Klosterman is on Andrew's read shelf. Andrew gave this book 4 stars. Shelve...

Why Can’t I Clean My Boyfriend’s House for Pay? — About a year ago, I moved into my boyfriend's house in a new city. I'm renting out my old house for income as I look for work. I pay my partner $100 each month to cover my utility expenses. He pays his cleaning person $160 a month to clean the house twice a month.

Is It Wrong to Divulge a Secret to Protect Someone’s Honor? — I'm an expat living in a country where H.I.V./AIDS is a severe taboo. My friend, also an expat, was diagnosed with H.I.V. while living here. She received almost no support or therapy of any form. Her attitude and behavior changed as she became ill, and she alienated and frustrated mutual friends.

The Karl Marx of the Hardwood — For seventy-five minutes, I talked to Steve Nash outside a restaurant in Lower Manhattan. Neither one of us ate anything; we mostly just watched it rain. I asked him a lot of questions; he politely answered all of them without saying anything remotely incendiary.

Why Tell Koko About Robin Williams’s Death? — According to press reports, Koko, the gorilla adept at sign language, seemed saddened to hear the news of the death of Robin Williams, whom the gorilla met once in 2001 (and bonded with immediately). I cannot fathom the ethical reasoning behind telling Koko about Williams's death.

Tourist Retractions — I recently spent several days at a relatively expensive hotel. The place was deplorable and unsanitary, with an unresponsive front desk. I gave it a poor write-up on, the travel website, titling my review "An Overpriced Dung Heap."
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Dec 18, 2014

@daveportivo That's a good point. I guess it would also imply I was like, "Glad this guy wasted his life in prison. Great ending."

Dec 16, 2014

RT @smartfootball: Hey, look, ten year-old boy, Nick Saban has not forgotten what you said about Blake Sims. He will never forget.…

Dec 09, 2014

I did a Q & A with Jimmy Page: He was (kind of) funny and (kind of) mean. He was very Jimmy Page-like.

Dec 07, 2014

The chairman of the committee does not know how many votes changed, or how many times they voted.

Dec 03, 2014

I'm not sure if someone has died on Mount Everest every year since 1977. I feel like I did read the somewhere, though. This might be true?

Dec 03, 2014

I honestly have no idea what year the movie COBRA was released. It turns out it was 1986.

Dec 03, 2014

The difference between the SEC West and the rest of NCAA football is not greater than the gap between the East and the West in the NBA.

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