Eats, writes about it. Ponces about on telly. Has big hair.

The White Swan: restaurant review — 300 Wheatley Lane Road, Fence, Lancashire (01282 611 773). Meal for two, with wine and service: £75 Forgive me if, for the next few sentences, I sound like a man tiptoeing through a field of uncracked raw eggs. I don't want to offend. Or to be precise, I'm very happy to offend but only with good reason.

Restaurant review: Novikov — 50a Berkeley Street, London W1 (020 7399 4330). Meal for two, including wine and service, £160 You could, if you wish, hate Novikov on principle. Arkady Novikov, whose name is above the door, owns 50 or so restaurants in Moscow and likes to boast of his connections to Vladimir Putin.

Wormwood: restaurant review — 16 All Saint's Road, London W11 (020 7854 1808). Meal for two, including wine and service: £150 Occasionally a plate of food comes along that forces me to pause. The sound of chatter fades. The light around the crockery seems to dim. I focus. Yup, I'm really that sad.

How Kids Company feeds Britain’s hungry children — Late afternoon in a south London kitchen, and the evening meal is being prepared. As in so many kitchens it's an opportunity for a chat. "What's a good thing to eat at home when you haven't got much food?" asks Susie Cunningham, one of the Kids Company therapeutic support workers who helps run the nightly afterschool cooking classes.

We don’t hand down family recipes any more. That’s not a bad thing — Recently on the Radio 4 food show The Kitchen Cabinet, the panel were asked to name dishes they had inherited from their parents. There was sweet talk of dense stews and shepherd's pies. As the chair of the show I wasn't required to answer and I was grateful for the fact.

Le Canut et les Gones: restaurant review — 29 rue de Belfort, Lyon (00 33 4 78 29 17 23). Meal for two, including drinks and service: £75 Come May, when Eurostar starts its direct service to Lyon (and southern points beyond), trains will depart London's St Pancras full of people who have missed breakfast.

Rex and Mariano: restaurant review — 2 St Anne's Court, London W1 (020 7437 0566). Meal for two, including wine and service: £80 This week's restaurant comes from the people who brought us Beast. You remember Beast. The one with the king crabs and the Nebraskan steaks and the over-engineered tables and the bill that made me feel like my scrotum had been put in an un-lubricated vice.

Harry’s Shack: restaurant review — 118 Strand Road, Portstewart, Northern Ireland (028 7083 1783). Meal for two, including drinks and service: £50 Last December, Harry's Shack, at Portstewart on Northern Ireland's north coast, issued a stark warning via Facebook. "It is simply not safe to come near us," it said. "Do not even attempt it."

The worst run place in Britain? — It was, all too appropriately, a march to absolutely nowhere. The 500 Hackney residents and council workers, who joined last Monday's demonstration against proposed emergency cuts to council services, trudged through the wind and the rain on a long, circuitous route that took them only from Hackney Town Hall all the way back to Hackney Town Hall.

Pub Landlord Al Murray on his election strategy: ‘I could drink Nigel Farage and William Hague under the table’ — If you get to Westminster, which of your fellow MPs would you want on a pub quiz team? Jonathan Freedland, executive editor, opinion Tricky. Pub quiz teams require an all-round knowledge of the outside world, so putting a team of MPs together won't be easy.
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Feb 27, 2015

Who thinks old Rupe's an arse? "@rupertmurdoch: Just flying over N Atlantic 300 miles of ice. Global warming!

Feb 27, 2015

@gilescoren @nigellorde @WatersideArts apart from when you're filming in North America for a month.

Feb 27, 2015

@NorthernLifeMag why have you posted an out of date interview with me? It talk about the Harrogate festival which was in July 2014.

Feb 27, 2015

@georgiashall no, of course, it wasn't you. No idea why @CafeRougeTweet are suggesting that. It was @elliottsagency who are to blame

Feb 27, 2015

@CafeRougeTweet @georgiashall She didn't invite me. She asked me my fee to attend. That's trying to buy my time. Staggeringly innapropriate

Feb 27, 2015

So Sunday March 8, My Dining Hell @BACKendal… recipe for pork and chorizo stew, is being served in the cafe

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