Headlines that write themselves

"Oh my god, Tom Selleck, you're literally stealing water from people?" reacts MLive's Kyle Feldscher, as the Los Angeles Times broke the news that the actor is getting "drought-shamed" after being accused of pilfering truckloads of public hydrant water for his ranch (1,300+ shares so far). Boston Globe's Laura Norton Amico had a similar response: "Stealing water from hydrants?!? Seriously California?" Incredibly enough, the water district reportedly even tried to get Selleck to "halt the unlawful water deliveries" before filing their official complaint. "A water district hired a private investigator to document alleged water theft at Tom Selleck's ranch … a P.I. for real," shares Julie Westfall with the LA Times. Which inevitably led to lots of these jokes: "Get Magnum on the case, stat," quips KPCC's Eric Zassenhaus. Hear that? That's the sound of headlines writing themselves.

Next up, a federal judge just upheld the cancellation of the Washington Redskins trademarks in a major legal and symbolic setback for the team. "So if the Redskins lose their trademark, can the Post call its blog Redskins Insider again?" wonders Washingtonian's Andrew Beaujon, referring to this. In other big news, United flights everywhere were grounded by a computer problem this morning--things have resumed, although delays persist.

Abroad, in a frantic effort to stabilize its market, China has banned stock sales by major shareholders for the next six months. "When markets get fragile, shut them down?" tweets Lisa Abramowicz at Bloomberg. In other financial crises, Greece's prime minister has pledged concrete proposals to bridge its creditor impasse. "#Greece seeks 3-year bailout fund from #eurozone as Tsipras demands 'genuine dialogue'," elaborates Wall Street Journal's Emre Peker. Meanwhile, however, life for Greek small businesses is dismal. "No Money, Mo' Problems," snarks Bloomberg's Toluse Olorunnipa. And remember Thomas Piketty's popular diatribe against Germany's alleged hypocrisy from earlier this week? Well, Joseph Cotterill has something to say about that. Bojan Pancevski with the Sunday Times calls it a "Must-read explanation (if needed) by @jsphctrl about why debt situations of #Greece & post-war Germany incomparable."

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