Eats, writes about it. Ponces about on telly. Plays a bit of jazz piano. Has big hair. Doesn't accept comps. Foreign.

Foley’s: restaurant review — Foley's, 23 Foley Street, London W1W 6DU (0203 137 1302). Meal for two, including drinks and service: £70-£100 At the start of our meal at Foley's our waitress fixed us with a big, cheery grin and announced that the restaurant served "beautiful food. You will love it." Oh dear.

Mercato Metropolitano: restaurant review — Mercato Metropolitano, 42 Newington Causeway, London SE1 6DR. Food per head: £10-£20 London is eating itself out of house and home, literally. The pressure for affordable housing is intense. People with jobs in the capital need places in which to live that don't leave them at the mercies of Southern Rail.

Next time you moan about the cost of a meal, think about who’s slaving in the kitchens — An email arrives from a young, discouraged restaurant cook who has recently parted company with her employers. It had been her dream job; the kind of serious kitchen in rural England to which she had long aspired. There was a contract, giving her 40 hours a week on minimum wage.

Gino D’Acampo - My Restaurant: restaurant review — Gino D'Acampo: My Restaurant, Euston Station, London NW1 2DU (020 7383 4846). Meal for two, including drinks and service: £50-£100 Often with weirdly deformed restaurants - and they don't come much weirder than this week's - naming the guilty can be tricky. No such problem here.

Why I have had to cancel my upcoming appearance at the Russian Hospitality Show. | Jay Rayner — I would like to apologise to anybody who was hoping to see my Ten (Food) Commandments show at Russian Hospitality Week in Moscow, over October 17/18. I have had to cancel my trip for reasons breath-takingly beyond my control. Although I was due to be paid for my work, the company that had...

The Bull and Ram: restaurant review — The Bull & Ram, Dromore Street, Ballynahinch, County Down BT24 8AG (028 9756 0908). Meal for two, including drinks and service: £90 The building that houses the dining room of the Bull & Ram, 30 minutes' drive south of Belfast, was never likely to be a vegan café.

Som Saa: restaurant review — Som Saa, 43a Commercial Street, London E1 6BD (020 7324 7790). Limited bookings for four or more. Meal for two including drinks and service: £75-£120 You join me in the smallest room in the house as I sit contemplating one of the biggest pieces of grit in life's pearly oyster, which is to say consequences.

Why it’s OK to play with your food — In the 1970s there was a Chinese restaurant near where I lived that served a dish they called sweet and sour pork. It was the colour of David Dickinson, and tasted of a cross between Tizer and orange-flavoured Nurofen. Naturally, being a kid, I thought it was brilliant.

Clipstone: London restaurant review — Clipstone, 5 Clipstone Street, London W1W 6BB (020 7637 0871). Meal for two including drinks and service: £80-£120 Among the readers of these reviews is a group of men preoccupied with their own arses. This is not abuse. I'm being literal.

Hantverk & Found: restaurant review — Hantverk & Found, 18 King Street, Margate CT9 1DA (01843 280 454). Meal for two including drinks and service: £60-£80 A bright Sunday morning in late summer and along King Street in Margate the pavements are stacked with tattered fragments of my late parents' lives.
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Oct 24, 2016

@DCRobTV @Bourdain @PartsUnknownCNN ah... so its gone out. Will have to find a way to view

Oct 23, 2016

@MoiraWalton have a great lunch. I'll just keep my fingers crossed it's not too good

Oct 23, 2016

This week's review: foley's where it's all 'shouty food and you shall have a bloody good time or else'. 

Oct 22, 2016

@NicMillersTale well... I feel I've been consistent though there is an award (in which I had no part) that shouldn't have happened

Oct 22, 2016

@sw19mum @MattBurton_law @_bandwagonesque @guardian it pretty much is. I make it clear in the book my version is a mild adaption of that

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