My top 3 favorite things are as follows: Melted cheese, the beach and christmas music. That's pretty much my life.

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@deets — 761 followers, 9,402 tweets

Nov 22, 2017

@EricTeetsel Wait. Are you saying that Christians hate lying? But they voted for Trump, and continue to support him in the face of insane amounts of lies? That does not compute.

Nov 22, 2017

How did @MoonPie become my favorite Twitter account? Don't care, just happy.

Nov 21, 2017

Just when I think Patriots fans are not all complete dicks, yup..they all are. 

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