Scott Crisp on Muck Rack

Scott Crisp

Contributor, NBC DFW

I'm a writer and a Texan and a stand-up comedian. I enjoy the smell of shopping malls and once saw the Oscar Mayer Wienermobile.

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@scottcrispson — 729 followers, 13,335 tweets

Sep 24, 2017

The only funeral director in town overheard me say "more like blundertaker" after he crashed his bike & now I'm never gonna get a good grave

Sep 24, 2017

U always know a relationship's in trouble when she stops laughing at your jokes

Sep 23, 2017

Seems like this is one of those times we should avoid the terms "Winner" & "Loser" altogether & just say the man who ate the most mayo idk

Sep 23, 2017

Bring back the snickers commercial where the old man says great googly moogly dot org

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