Scott Crisp on Muck Rack

Scott Crisp

Contributor, NBC DFW

I'm a writer and a Texan and a stand-up comedian. I enjoy the smell of shopping malls and once saw the Oscar Mayer Wienermobile.

Search Tweets

Twitter Feed

@scottcrispson — 742 followers, 14,170 tweets

Waldo Faldo from Family Matters has a) an uncle who works as a human cannonball in the circus b) a sister named Quesadilla, who was born in a Taco Bell, and c) a grandpa who signed up for the wrong army after the outbreak of WW2 & ended up fighting for Mussolini This shit’s canon
Once in like 2008 my pal saw Mark Cuban in a Whole Foods parking lot in North Dallas and he was like “oh shit what’s up man” and Cubes was like “hey what’s up” so I actually think it’d be dishonest NOT to imply I was part of the 10-11 NBA Championship team on my resumé.
The super bowl is cancelled sorry everyone
Show More