Building Boys Bulletin

A recent Parents article asks, "Why Are Boys Behind in Reading? The "answer," according to the article, is largely parents: Consider early parenting activities…A 2013 research study of parenting activities in the U.S., the U.K., and Canada found that parents subconsciously spent “significantly more time” reading, learning letters, and using numbers with girls from infancy.

Parenting boys today feels a bit like a high wire act. We’re supposed to build and encourage emotional intelligence, empathy & compassion in a world that still rewards the exact opposite (at least when exhibited by men). We’re supposed to develop and nurture close, loving relationships with our boys — but if we do, those relationships viewed suspiciously. Boy moms, in particular, are accused of emotional incest. (Don’t believe me?

It’s almost Independence Day here in the United States. On July 4, we celebrate our country’s independence — which is something many countries do, but as I write that, I realize it’s also a very American thing to do. We really value independence. Almost to a fault, I’d argue (given that humans are interdependent social creatures). And yet, children and teens today have less independence and autonomy in years past.

Maybe Father’s Day weekend is not the best time get prickly about a focus on fathers. But whether he intended it not (& I’m pretty sure he didn’t), the first sentence of Richard V. Reeves’ latest Substack post — “I’ve come to believe that if there is a one-word solution to the challenges of boys and men it is this: fatherhood.” — completely ignores the presence (& importance of) moms in boys’ lives.

Why do we continue to expect [mothers] to bear, almost single-handedly, the weight of problems that concern society as a whole? — Amani Braa I know many of you feel that weight. That’s one of the reasons being a mom of a boys feels so hard, so important, so challenging. We know our societies have been hurt by violent men, racist men, sexist men, selfish men, & even good guys who don’t speak up in the face of atrocious acts. We want to do better.

What does summer look like for your family?

Middle school is a confusing time — for boys AND their parents! It’s a time when boys pull away & pivot their attention to their peers. A time when grades, academic achievement, and organization seem particularly important (to parents) & not-at-all interesting (or important) to most boys. A time when misunderstanding between boys & parents can spark unnecessary conflicts that can consume the whole household with fire, metaphorically-speaking.

Building Boys Bulletin 5-25-26 1 in 3 boys are NOT suicidal. Despite a recent misleading headline published by Parents, which claims “Nearly 1 in 3 Young Boys Report Suicidal Thoughts” and then promises to tell parents what they need to know. Here’s what you really need to know: Whoever wrote and okayed that headline misinterpreted or misrepresented the data. The data shows that 1 in 3 boys under age 14 who contacted the Crisis Text line reported suicidal thoughts.

Jessica Sabatini is worried about her six-year-old’s success in school. Not because he has trouble learning but primarily, she says, because he’s a boy. That’s the opening of a CBC article published this week — and based on the response so far, it’s clear that Jessica isn’t alone. And her concerns are not misplaced. When I reached out to Jessica this week, she told me, “I was surprised by the feedback that I have been receiving over this and how it is resonating with people.” I’m not surprised.

I sent you an inactive link for my Boy Mom Circle. I’m experimenting with some new (to me) technology & didn’t realize/somehow missed that I had to “publish” the Google Form before you could effectively use it. Which I discovered today, when I tried a test registration. (Lessons were learned!) I’ve fixed it now. Here you go: Step 1: Fill out this short form Step 2: Complete payment OR I’ll follow up with the Zoom link & details.