BASIC

You know it’s officially fall when my kids start asking me to order their Halloween costumes (cue Mary Poppins). And while the temps in Los Angeles are still hitting the upper 80’s, I’m itching to bust out some fall layers and fall pops of plaid. Speaking of, Guest in Residence recently sent me this tartan jacket and I cannot wait to wear it. It’s always around this time of year that I start to day dream about escaping somewhere cooler.

“How do you like your coffee?” is one of the more common questions I get asked. Whether it’s a business meeting, a light conversation with a new friend, or the Uber Eats app that I use to have my coffee delivered half the time (don’t at me). One month you’re an oat milk latte person. A few weeks later you take it black, and no one is calling it a crisis. You’ve just changed. So why does the rest of like feel so different? Kids leave. Parents age. Relationships shift. Bodies change. Minds evolve.

You can imagine my extreme joy when I read that lazy beauty is officially “in.” It’s something I’ve subscribed to for years and when Geri Hirsch shared this article in her Weekly Update, I jumped for joy. As someone who genuinely doesn’t love makeup, or quite frankly brushing my hair, I finally feel seen (ha!). I grew up on a farm in Texas, where beauty wasn’t really part of the conversation.

When Emily Ratajkowski shared her story about her divorce rings, I paid very close attention. At that time I was just under a year after my own divorce, and thanks to the way things shook out, I was sitting on two beautiful rings I’d acquired during my marriage. Not my original engagement ring or wedding band, but two pieces that were always going to be mine. But I still found myself feeling guilty about it.

Because last month’s share seemed to be such a big hit with you, I thought I’d share the latest and greatest list of everyday basics that I’ve recently passed along to my besties. The Best Cardigan - You’ve probably seen me wearing the crap out of this in red. I love it so much that I need to invest in the same one in navy and maybe even green for good measure. It ties perfectly around the waist and is a nice weight to carry us all through fall. I am obsessed with this one.

It’s peak summer in Los Angeles, and temps are hitting 100. Not complaining, but I’ve definitely been scouring Pinterest for some fresh outfit inspiration. I pulled a few simple, easy looks below that will hopefully get your wheels turning on how to take your daytime outfits into the evening with a simple cardigan draped over your shoulders or wrapped around your waist. I particularly love the Simkhai dress at the bottom. It would be perfect for a summer wedding.

When I took the kids to Texas at the beginning of the summer, my daughter was telling family and friends that daddy’s girlfriend is moving in. She wasn’t telling me. I already knew. Grant and I had talked it to death. The entire family unit has been in therapy together, and separately, for years now. And we’re all doing this to the best of our ability, the “right way.” But as I watched June share this news with family, I couldn’t help but catch her doing something I haven’t stopped thinking about.

I found myself sitting in a therapy session, asking myself a question I hadn’t said out loud to another person before: How can I want and have the ordinary parts of my life without allowing them to convince me that I am ordinary? A few years ago when I started this Substack, I was fresh out of my split and my ego was bruised. Not lightly bruised, deeply bruised.

I know many of you are going to either roll your eyes or let out a “Nooooo, not yet.” I’m sorry (not sorry), but I just can’t help myself. Listen, I’m definitely not ready to say “bye” to summer quite yet. In fact, I refuse to acknowledge that summer is ending until October 10th because I live in Los Angeles and summer arrives three months late.

There was a moment during divorce where I thought I was choosing between my old life and a new one. What I did not understand was that after my divorce, I would first have to exist for a while with no fully formed identity at all. It was kind of like sitting in a very dark room with no sound, no light, no sense of what was coming. It wasn’t necessarily scary. It was just unknown. In many ways, sitting in this darkness was just like our star, Sirius.