Kat River

I’ve had most of my life being told to dream big and shoot for the stars. I know even in that sentence I’m luckier than many. My parents always supporting us to be creative and challenge ourselves. When I found the personal development very early on, in some very impressionable years of my life - the subtle and not so subtle message was GO BIGGER. Push yourself.

I’ll admit, Getting married young meant that there was many parts of myself I was yet to know. Though I’d likely say that if I got married at 40 too because we are ever changing, I definitely got married way younger than I had ever thought I would. I was 22. Engaged at 21. I’m grateful for my relationship to my intuition back then because even though there was fear for me, there was a whisper of “yes, keep going” and so I did. I was scared I was too young.

Hello beautiful people. In this publication I’ll give a honest update on where I’m at right now. I’ll also chat about a mentorship session I received recently, especially in relation to my relationship to creativity, as a mother, and how that strongly correlates to the way I was born. I hope you receive some insight from reading and can see more clearly your own patterns of creation…. Especially if you are a mother, but absolutely if you are not.

Lovers Re-Connect I remember when I fell pregnant, one of the bigger fears that arose in me was the fear that my relationship with Tully would change. I was so scared that we would become ships in the night, Passing each other by, And all our focus would shift onto a baby… And what if that never changed? What if that simply became our new normal. What if Tully moved deeper into his work, And what If I let myself be overcome by motherhood? What if we would forget the stunning love we had shared?

Okay, Lets talk about making friends, and being apart of a modern day village as a mum. It’s a topic I feel like I have a decent amount of experience and confidence in, And a topic that’s often discussed/ questions are asked.

“I don’t believe we have to go back and Live AS our roots, or AS our ancestors, or AS our childhood in order to experience depth, But I do believe if we cut them off and try to replant in a new life, no matter how beautiful, there will always be a part of ourselves starved of sustenance. If we try to leave it all behind and write an entirely new story, we deprive ourselves of the honest gift of who we are.

I have read a total of Zero blog posts or books on night weaning. Mainly because I just wanted to roll with being responsive moment to moment rather than trying to follow a set strategy. Honestly I had no idea how to go about it and somehow weaning felt harder than the alternative (of sleeping through the night and no longer feeding overnight) We co-sleep and plan to continue doing so. Rafi’s favourite place in the world is right there between Tul & I snuggled up.

Our dream was presented to us on a golden platter…. And we said no. These last few weeks have been big for us. For any of you that have been around for a while, know that we are in a vision quest towards a big goal in our life. To “own” land (I say that in quotation marks because we all know who the true custodians of this land is) To have a cottage that we have full creative rights to and can craft it into a home to raise our family in.

Three pieces of writing for you. Motherhood & being seen// Musings on loneliness & self exploration// Transformation is slow// These are three pieces of writing from my poetry & Insights book that I’m currently back in the groove of editing and adding to. My friend @kj.stone_ released her poetry book called “the week before I bleed” recently and I pick it up every night from my bedside table and read a few pages. Last night it had me in tears.

Break up with “permission” and just parent how you want. It’s not news to me that many mothers are feeling unfulfilled, confused in their motherhood. Feeling like “Is this it?” and relying on coffee or a glass of red to “get through the day”.