The World is F*cking Cool

See you soon, Jacqueline PS — Former paid subscribers: you will not be charged upon relaunch. TWIFC is moving to a new funding model, keeping everything free for readers.

Howdy, twifckers. If you’ll scan your inboxes, you’ll notice that I’ve been absent these past few weeks. To cut to the chase: I’ve been feeling a bit overwhelmed by *gestures at world* and feel myself needing a new chapter. I have paused paid subscriptions; unfortunately, in doing so, I lost any differentiation in my subscribers—I only know this as I tried to send a note to paid subscribers explaining this, and the list was gone.

Happy 4th, y’all. This year, the extent of my patriotism is this bowl of yogurt, strawberries, and blueberries. My neighbor’s Trump flag is back up after a three-month-plus hiatus. I assume the holiday guilt got to them. My “Foxtrot Delta Tango” flag remains unchanged. I missed last week’s 5FT as I was in Voyageurs National Park, which, wow, what a ball of wax that place is. Lovely, don’t get me wrong, but let’s put it this way: The only in-park lodging is the Kettle Falls Hotel, below.

Howdy, y’all. It’s Friday! We made it yet again! Next time you hear from me, I’ll be wandering Voyageurs National Park in Minnesota—until then, I come to you from my too-cluttered desk in Wisconsin, where I sit between battles with the chipmunks and squirrels digging up all my native plants. It’s important to have enemies. Wish me luck—I’m losing.

I’m debuting a new series, probably, titled “5 minutes on: X.” It’s me taking five minutes of my time (a symbolic five minutes, naturally), and you giving no more than five minutes of yours. Topics will run the gamut and be conversational. Let’s dive in. On Monday, the Louvre, the world's most-visited museum, — not due to war, pandemic, or emergency, but because its own staff couldn't breathe under the crushing weight of mass tourism.

Hola, twifckeroos. I’m back in Wisconsin after a week in California spent sitting in hot tubs and hiking through sage-filled canyons. I love the Midwest, I do, but…damn. I can see why the houses are seven billion dollars. But at least we have beer and cheese, so there’s that. Onto 5FT: Thing #1: Alnwick Castle, in England’s Northumberland countryside, has nearly a thousand years of history — it serves as the home of the Duke of Northumberland.

Howdy from Southern California, y’all. The weather is perfect. The rents are high. The Mexican food is fabulous. My itinerary includes eating my weight in chips and salsa. (To be honest, my mom took a fall, but she’s doing alright, all things considered.) Moving on. I have a couple favors to ask: I got a rankings report in my inbox about the world’s worst beaches, wrote it up in Yahoo, and it’s performing well. If you’ve got hook-y reports up your sleeve, let me know.

It’s a lovely day. Let’s get out there: Thing #1: California’s Project Nexus is off and running — which is to say, solar panels are being installed over irrigation canals. It’s an idea that’s been floated for years, but naturally, it’s only now catching on. Studies say it could save 63 billion gallons of water annually—water that the President hopefully won’t dump into the ocean. Thing #2: Did you see the Birch Glacier collapse in Switzerland?

One of the perks of this gig is getting to talk to people who would never, ever otherwise speak with you. The below interview is probably one of the most candid I’ve ever been a part of—so candid that I’m only now realizing that I’m not sure I did the job I was supposed to do.

Hey, twifckers. I’m back stateside—not only did I make it through immigration, but with all the cameras, I waved my blue passport at a man from 15 feet away, and he gave me an unimpressed wave. That was it. As much as it was super-swift, I sure wish you could still get passport stamps wherever you go. I did not find an ichthyosaur while on the Jurassic Coast last week, but I did manage to find some ammonite and belemnite (squid) bits. Really shoulda become a paleontologist.