Songwriter, Journalist & Sobriety Enthusiast, Smart Ass Pantheist🌏🍄☮️ #sober #russellstreetreport
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Articles by Dave Tieff
Silver Lining For Ravens Fans
I intended to write a short article "before" the game yesterday, but then I realized the content would be a virtual carbon copy of the article I wrote before the first game of last season - one that the Ravens eventually lost to the Chiefs in Arrowhead in the final seconds. (see: Likely toe tap) Shortly after the game ended last night, still pondering how to fix the clenched fist holes in my drywall, it occurred to me that the agonizing redundancy of the Ravens IS the article, so here goes....
"There Are No Coincidences!"
No seriously, there totally are Press enter or click to view image in full size There Are Coincidences: We Just Keep Misusing the Word We've all heard someone say, "There are no coincidences." Usually with a knowing smirk, a raised eyebrow, or that sage-like tone that makes you feel like you're about to be let in on a cosmic secret. The problem is... it's not true. There are coincidences. That's literally what the word means.
The Many Ways Social Media Kills Relationships
In a world where connection is just a click away, the same technology designed to bring us closer is increasingly tearing romantic relationships apart. Social media, once heralded as a revolutionary tool for staying in touch, has become a growing force in the breakdown of marriages and the erosion of meaningful dating.
Tune Out, Turn Off, Drop In
Tune Out, Turn Off, Drop In Too many, perhaps. But it would be disingenuous to say that all of them had a negative impact on my life. Alcohol almost killed me, cocaine’s juice wasn’t worth the squeeze, and opiates never did it for me (thankfully) on the rare occasion that I experimented with them. I’ve also run the gamut with psychedelics, and while the way in which I used them was not ideal from a therapeutic standpoint, I have to admit they changed my life for the better.
From Feminism To The Manosphere
From Feminism To The Manosphere If there’s one thing that should be obvious in America today, the fringes aren’t just cringy, they’re becoming more unhinged, and inching closer to the middle by the day. Long before MAGA and vagina hats became the chosen dunce caps of the outer edges, the immortal George Carlin summed it up nicely: “People are wonderful. I love individuals. I hate groups of people. I hate a group of people with a ‘common purpose’. ’Cause pretty soon they have little hats. And armbands.
Why Big Alcohol Loves Alcoholics Anonymous
At first glance, Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) and Big Alcohol should be natural enemies — one claims to help people stop drinking, while the other profits from people who drink too much. But dig a little deeper, and you’ll find a disturbing symbiosis: AA’s core philosophy helps protect the alcohol industry.
Dear Single Moms, Father’s Day Is Not About You
No one person is a mother and a father. Stop the nonsense. If you’re a single mother and the father is not in the picture, I feel for you. That’s a lot of hard work, and if you’re doing a good job, I applaud you. But you’re not a Father. Get over yourself. You may have to take on tasks traditionally assigned to the father and have twice (or 10x) the work of a married mother, but that doesn’t make you a Dad. Not being a father doesn’t tarnish all that you do, but it’s a slight to Fathers everywhere.
AA Is A Religious Program
No matter how loud they claim it isn’t Alcoholics Anonymous claiming that it isn’t a religious program is like McDonald’s claiming that it isn’t fast food because the drive-thru takes a while. “It’s not a religious program, it’s a spiritual program.” I’ve heard that a million times, but it’s a religious program in every sense of the word. Here’s the Google definition of religious: re·li·gious /rəˈlijəs/ adjective: religious relating to or believing in a religion.
The Patriarchy Is No Match For Real Feminine Power
Unfortunately, that power is scarce right now If you have a bone to pick with the patriarchy, join the club. I keep checking my mailbox because I haven’t received my patriarchal dividend check in months. Granted, I haven’t attended any of the meetings lately, but I don’t know where they’re located anymore. Someone must’ve taken me off the patriarchy email list. Probably Chuck. Fuck that guy. He probably found out I didn’t vote for Trump.
Myth: The Male Loneliness Epidemic
The data tells a different story The male loneliness epidemic is not a thing. Well, it is, but it’s more of a viral trope perpetuated by women on TikTok than an actual epidemic. Some (not all) women are practically rejoicing that men are lonely, as if this somehow benefits them or society. The other myth associated with the male loneliness epidemic is that men are the ones claiming to be victims of it.
Time Is More Valuable Than Money
What “rich” means in the 21st Century Years ago, I picked up Timothy Ferriss’s groundbreaking book The Four-Hour Work Week when I saw the term “New Rich” on the cover. Published in 2007 and having sold over 2 million copies since, its contents significantly impacted how I view wealth and net worth; specifically, time vs. money. It wasn’t the guy in a hammock on the cover or the idea of working only four hours a week.
Women Aren’t Doing Well
You can see it, hear it, and feel it I don’t blame women for living with a general sense of neurotic anxiety with Trump in office. Honestly, it’s still puzzling to me how any woman voted for him, yet 53% of white women did just that. Approximately 31.4 million white women voted for Trump in 2024. Let that number sink in. Let it wash over you. It’s not just puzzling, it’s staggering. Dumbfounding.
The Key To A Happy Relationship Is Living Apart
Yes, even if you’re married In a world where romantic partnerships are often expected to follow the traditional blueprint — meet, fall in love, move in, get married — suggesting that couples might benefit from not living together can sound radical. But for a growing number of people, particularly those in long-term relationships or second marriages, the idea of Living Apart Together (LAT) isn’t just novel — it’s a solution that keeps love alive and resentment at bay.
One BJ Per Week Could Save Your Marriage
Blow new life into your relationship I never want to speak for “all men,” because, you know, all men are different, and pigeonholing half the planet's population with a specific characteristic is the height of ignorance. We all know that.
Black Eyed Susan
A song for those we impact on the crooked road to sobriety Dave Tieff · Follow 3 min read · -- I rarely write songs that would be considered a “true story,” but practically every song I’ve ever written is “based on true events.” Once I’ve experienced something and a pattern emerges, it usually appears as a song, a mosaic of those experiences. My imperfect path to sobriety is one of those experiences. I have very few regrets in life.
What Women Have All Wrong About Men
Pt 2: Men like younger women because they’re easily manipulated Dave Tieff · Follow 6 min read · -- Belichick hasn’t smiled this much in years I stumbled upon a podcast (the name escapes me) with four women in their forties discussing relationships. The format was similar to The View’s — if The Real Housewives were the hosts. They were all white, a tad bougie, and a little disgruntled. One woman enthusiastically proclaimed that she had figured out why men like younger women.
OnlyFools
Member-only story Don’t rush in — channel your male drive into something useful Dave Tieff · Follow 4 min read · -- Today, millions of ordinary women have become OnlyFans models. Though we should probably pump the breaks on the term “model.” That’s a generous title when taking a selfie of your T&A is the job description.
A Hotel Room In Hell
Did I live all my life just to die in this fucking hotel? Dave Tieff · Follow 3 min read · -- I’ve ended up in a few hotel rooms and learned there’s a vast difference between staying at a hotel and ending up at a hotel. Staying at a hotel is what you do when you go on vacation, take a trip, or enjoy a weekend getaway. If you’re with your babe, the change of scenery — and disregard for housekeeping — can lead to a night of romance that’s hard to top at home.
Sober Dating
The pros, cons, and potential pitfalls Dave Tieff · Follow 7 min read · -- I’ve been happily divorced now for seven years. That’s not a jab at my ex-wife; it’s the opposite. I’m grateful that we peacefully co-parent our two boys and do things as a modern family that I never imagined pre-divorce. The above photo is not of my ex-wife but of my girlfriend. Oh…and it’s not my girlfriend but my “girl-friend.” Allow me to explain… That’s my BFF Lauren — who only dates women.
3 Words That Give Alcohol Too Much Power: Recovery, Sober, Alcoholic
If you’re alcohol-free, they no longer describe you Dave Tieff · Follow 3 min read · -- I hate labels. Not the kind that come on food packages; the kind that you carelessly slap on others — and yourself. Those are the labels that I don’t bother reading. When human labels are necessary — which is rare — I’m conscientious about what label I use on myself and, more importantly, how I label others.
Do You Have A Drinking Problem?
There’s an easy way to tell Dave Tieff · Follow 4 min read · -- This is a question that millions of people ask themselves at some point in their lives. Do I have a drinking problem? I asked myself this question too many times to count, which was the first red flag. When the writing is on the wall, you have to read it.
What Women Have All Wrong About Men
Member-only story Pt. 4 “Where are all the good men?” The answer is obvious Dave Tieff · Follow 5 min read · -- Mrs podcast probably won’t tell you the truth We hear this question often and see it posted regularly on social media. It’s typically posted by a disillusioned single woman in her 30s (or older) who just got home from a deflating night on the dating scene. You can almost smell the espresso martinis through Facebook.
We Are NOT A Christian Nation
Member-only story No Matter How Loud You Say it Dave Tieff · Follow 3 min read · -- Have you ever noticed that those who seem to live and breathe for their 2nd Amendment rights ignore the 1st Amendment completely? Proclaiming, even at a high volume, that America is a “Christian nation” isn’t just blissful ignorance. It requires an almost categorical denial of everything our country was founded on, a blind spot that rivals an 18-wheeler. Have you read the 1st Amendment?
What The Stanford Study Of AA’s Effectiveness (Really) Says
Member-only story It’s all about connection Dave Tieff · Follow 7 min read · -- In my discussions with AA members — some of whom are not too pleased with my critiques of the program — many have pointed to the conclusion of the 2020 Stanford Study of the Effectiveness of Alcoholics Anonymous.
“Men Can’t Be Friends With Women Without Wanting Sex”
…And other bullshit blanket statements Dave Tieff · Follow 5 min read · -- Harry: You realize of course that we could never be friends. Sally: Why not? Harry: What I’m saying is — and this is not a come-on in any way, shape or form — is that men and women can’t be friends because the sex part always gets in the way. This exchange is from the movie When Harry Met Sally, starring Billy Crystal and Meg Ryan — a box office smash in 1989.
Your Pet Is Not Your Child
I don’t create the delusions — I just jot them down Dave Tieff · Follow 3 min read · -- I have a 2024 Nissan Rogue — and I loooove it. I get giddy just thinking about it. It’s great on gas for a mid-sized SUV, has all the room I need for my guitar and music equipment, and it’s perfect for trips with my teenage sons. Sure, there are fancier and more expensive cars with more bells and whistles, but I love this car.
The Evil Matriarchy
Fueling the filters, lip injections, and an endless quest for likes Dave Tieff · Follow 5 min read · -- I would never claim to speak for all men, but let’s face it: men are pretty basic. If we see a woman with curves, we’ll notice. We’re biologically wired for it. Don’t blame us — blame the manufacturer. For most men, the next thing we notice in a woman, almost instantaneously, is a pretty face. But a pretty face can be highly subjective. As individuals, we like what we like.
“Murphy’s Law” And Other Disempowering Bullshit
Dave Tieff · Follow 4 min read · -- We all know the cliche people use when something goes wrong. Some unexpected obstacle appears out of nowhere, and inevitably, a defeated friend, family member, or coworker feels compelled to say, “Echh…it figures…Murphy’s Law.” (womp womp) The consensus understanding of this so-called “law” is that if something can go wrong, it will. Wait whaa? I smell bullshit. So, I began to ponder. What is the phrase’s origin, is it an actual law, and who the hell is Murphy?
Why This Atheist Loves Christmas
A heathen’s guide to the most wonderful time of the year Dave Tieff · Follow 6 min read · -- I love Christmas. It truly is the most wonderful time of the year. The Christmas season officially (or unofficially?) begins on Black Friday, and that’s precisely when my Christmas spirit kicks into gear. It then lasts until New Year’s Day, when we collectively rise at noon with a head-pounding hangover and our underwear on backward to start considering when to throw out the tree.
The 4B Movement
Cutting your hair off to spite your face Dave Tieff · Follow 3 min read · -- Daughters who shaved their heads to support mom battling cancer In the wake of President-elect Donald Trump’s win over Kamala Harris, some far-left feminists have adopted the ideology of the 4B movement that originated in South Korea. The four B’s (when translated to English) represent their refusal to have sex with, date, marry, or have children with men.
Why Fat Acceptance Is Dead Wrong
It should be obvious — but here goes Dave Tieff · Follow 5 min read · -- If the title of this article is triggering because you believe the author doesn’t understand what it’s like to be overweight, let me put that notion to rest. I was the proverbial fat kid. Not only do I know intimately what it’s like to be fat, but I was overweight during my formative years, so the fat kid in my psyche remains. Let me be clear. Calling an individual insulting names is not okay.
New Woke/Feminism Loses In 3 Ways - Strategically, Culturally, And Morally
Pile on me now — then get your shit together for 2028 Dave Tieff · Follow 5 min read · -- Did they run out of Jews for Hitler banners? What’s the point of a movement if it doesn’t seek allies, garner strength and acceptance, and win elections? When it fails to do the first two, it’s not likely to accomplish the third. The political left—which I lean toward but am sick of seeing blow elections—should conduct a rigorous self-evaluation.
Lenny Kravitz Has Been Celibate For Nine Years
He might be on to something Dave Tieff · Follow 6 min read · -- Lenny Kravitz is the coolest motherfucker on planet Earth. That isn’t up for debate. How many guys can wear high-heeled boots and a purple boa and steal your wife on the same night? When Prince passed away, that list went from two names to one: 1)Lenny. Lenny Kravitz drips with so much swag that you forget his name is “Lenny Kravitz.” That name doesn’t sound like a god of rock ‘n roll; it sounds like someone who does your taxes.
30 Days No Electronics
Here’s What Happened To Me Dave Tieff · Follow 6 min read · -- My morning view — courtesy of Ashley Treatment Center I knew I was in trouble when COVID-19 and the ensuing lockdown took effect in 2020. Before it all went down, I felt confident in my sobriety and was looking forward to a full calendar of spring and summer gigs. Then it happened. At the time, I relied on playing music for roughly 50% of my income.
Toxic Femininity: The Bear That Got Trump Elected
Don’t shoot the messenger — the results are in Dave Tieff · Follow 4 min read · -- I’m a straight white man, and I support women’s rights. I have voted for women’s rights my entire adult life. Once upon a time, in the 90s, I was considered very progressive and took my fair share of heat because of it. I was called a hippie and a tree hugger, which was a fair assessment even when it was intended as an insult — my long hair and Grateful Dead tie-dye notwithstanding.
Addition By Subtraction
How letting go of people (and stuff) adds more to your life Dave Tieff · Follow 7 min read · -- When my wife and I separated, I had little choice but to downsize. We had made an amicable decision on how to divide the house post-divorce: she’d get the inside, and I’d get the outside. Pretty standard. We agreed that the boys came first and that the best move for them was not to move at all.
Lenny Kravitz Has Been Celibate For Nine Years
Why Lenny might be on to something Dave Tieff · Follow 5 min read · -- Lenny Kravitz is the coolest motherfucker on planet Earth. That isn’t even up for debate. How many guys can wear high-heeled boots and a purple boa and steal your wife the same night? When Prince passed away, that list went from two names down to one: Lenny. Think about it.
Why Men Who Support Women’s Issues Don’t Support Far Left Feminism
Why Men Who Support Women’s Issues Don’t Support Far Left Feminism A strong woman raised me. My parents got divorced when I was eight years old, mainly due to my father’s heavy drinking and carousing. When he moved out, he remained in my life, but I only visited him every other weekend, so my mom took on the lion’s share of parental responsibilities. My sister, who was three years older, often declined to visit my father, who seemed indifferent to her decision.
Why Fat Acceptance Is Dead Wrong
If the title of this article is triggering because you believe the author doesn’t understand what it’s like to be overweight, let me put that to rest. Not only do I know intimately what it’s like to be fat, but I was fat during my formative years, so the fat kid in my psyche still resides. We don’t accept smoking, illicit drug use, or heavy drinking as a healthy lifestyle, so there’s no reason to accept obesity.
Being Strong Feels Like Shit
Have you ever noticed that people compliment your strength when you feel everything collapsing around you? When life is lollipops and unicorns — who needs to be strong? Even if you feel like you are living a lie. “They call me strong — but I sure as hell don’t feel strong.” But when do you feel strong? It’s not when everything is going exceptionally well — or when you’re lying on the beach or frolicking through the lily fields. You’re strong because you feel like shit — but you keep going anyway.
These Addictive Substances Are Approved By AA
These Addictive Substances Are Approved By AA With the widespread legalization of marijuana across the US, the debate among AA members about “mind-altering substances” is picking up steam. For many years, using marijuana for any reason was viewed as a relapse in AA and would summarily revoke your sober time. If you use marijuana while in AA, you have to start back on day one — at least if you admit to it.
Separation, Divorce, And Alcohol
My now ex-wife and I have been officially divorced since 2017. We separated in 2015, and once I moved out of the house, things went downhill for me quickly. Our separation and ensuing divorce was about as mutual and amicable as possible. The reasons for our marriage dissolving are perfectly cliche. We grew apart, the passion was gone, intimacy suffered, and communication was poor. We both agreed on this — even in the midst of it all. My wife had only known me as a sober person.
How AA Chases People Away From Sobriety
My Instagram page has become an amazing way to connect with other alcohol-free (AF) people - one that I never expected. As a musician, I first got on IG to promote my music, but that started to evolve as soon as I started to post about sobriety. As one could expect, I got some feedback from the people who listen to my music but also like to drink. Some were a bit confused - and maybe even a bit put off by it.
We Shouldn't Call It "Sober"
/ˈsōbər/ adjective not affected by alcohol; not drunk. What is being sober but our static way of existing? We are all born sober, and (hopefully) that's how we will spend most of our lives, so drinking and drunk are the outliers - not the other way around. I know this is semantics and oversimplification and that the word "sober" has its place. But being sober shouldn't require a declaration. It's normal. It's homeostasis. It's the status quo. Here's what I mean...
Did You Know Alcohol Causes Cancer?Most Americans Do Not
I'm going to tell you a story about Susan. Susan has never had a problem with alcohol. At least, she never thought she did. Then she got breast cancer. Susan started drinking in college, and like most college kids, she overdid it from time to time. Once she graduated, she got a good job and started drinking moderately with her girlfriends on the weekends - never during the work week. She knew that interfered with her energy, mood, and focus.
Dangerous Advice From AA Members You Have To Read To Believe
The only way to fully understand the dangerous advice you may get at any given AA meeting is to see it yourself. I could tell you about my own experience at great length, but you have to read it with your own eyes. My first article on this subject, "Dangerous Advice From AA Members-That I Had To Screenshot," led to many responses on Medium and social media (Instagram: Dave Tieff).
The Simple 3-Letter Formula That Changed My Life
I had a major shift in my thinking in my late 30s. When I look back over my life, I can pinpoint certain times when things changed drastically for me, and usually, it was because I was trying to overcome a major difficulty. When I stumbled upon this simple formula, life was going well, but it opened my eyes to a new way of looking at hardships - which all of us have. E+R=O Event+Response=Outcome. When I was younger, I bought into the illusion that I was a victim of life's events.
Top 5 Alcoholics Anonymous Phrases That Are Bullshit (Pt.3)
Since there's already been a Part 1 and Part 2 of this list - with an explanation of why I bothered to list them in the first place - I will jump right in..... 5. Maybe they're not a real alcoholic? When AA members hear about someone who has gotten sober without AA and has done well in the process, they like to say, "Maybe they weren't a real alcoholic." Many don't like to believe that someone chose a different path and found sobriety another way.
A Good Man Is Never Wasted
By Dave Tieff Why good men & heavy drinking are incompatible If I ask you what character traits make up "a good man," what are the first words that pop into your head? Words like honest, loyal, trustworthy, respectful, hard-working, and passionate will top the list. There are variations of these words, but they all fall under the umbrella of...
Mike McDaniel's Candid Battle With Alcohol Abuse
By Dave Tieff How it makes him an even greater leader of men Mike McDaniel at a postgame press conference Mike McDaniel, head coach of the Miami Dolphins, is known around the NFL for his innovative and cerebral approach to the game and his quirky and unique personality. Once a Yale wide receiver and a lifelong student of the game, McDaniel pursued his dream of becoming an NFL coach...
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