Eric Milzarski
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I used to do things.
Articles by Eric Milzarski
The console wars are over: Xbox joins PS5 and PC in ‘Helldivers 2’
Following its release on February 8, 2024, “Helldivers 2” quickly became a favorite amongst PS5 and PC players. The game won multiple awards, including BAFTA’s Best Multiplayer Game, TIGA’s Game of the Year, and the Golden Joystick’s Multiplayer and Console Game of the Year. With its Player versus Environment (PvE) format, collaborative objectives, and murderous swarms of undemocratic alien enemies, “Helldivers 2” encourages teamwork and bonds players in the crucible of digital combat.
Why cats were the perfect companions in the trenches of WWI
There’s no truer way to describe it: Life in the trenches of WWI was absolute hell. If an enemy bullet, artillery shell, or gas canister didn’t kill you, the cesspool of diseases that formed in the puddles at the bottom of the trenches surely would. To make matters worse, the damp, dingy, and dirty environment made for the perfect breeding ground for rats that would carry and spread deadly diseases.
7 mind-numbing phrases military leaders use to seem smarter
Nothing hurts the ears of everyone in the platoon like hearing the same phrase used in countless situations by military leaders. At points, it seems like entire conversations are geared toward that specific phrase just to make whomever is speaking feel like the smartest person in the room. Military leaders like officers, senior enlisted, and even the occasional high-speed specialist who’s trying to prove themselves are guilty of using these phrases to feel smarter than the rest. 1.
Top 7 troops you'll always want to have your back
There’s an old saying in the military: There are three types of troops that you always want to have your back: the cooks, the medics, and whoever happens to be repeating this tired, old saying. Despite the fact that it’s a cliche, there’s a nugget of truth in there. Every single troop plays an important role in this crazy mechanism we call the military — but some roles more important than others. Regardless of whether they’re cool with you, they should be doing their job.
The 'Pando Commandos' were more intense than you'd think
For the 2017 Army-Navy Game, the Army’s jerseys celebrated the 10th Mountain Division (Light Infantry), the predecessor to the current 10th Mountain Division.
6 awesome Navy films that you should watch at least once
Hollywood does its best to try and capture the essence of what it means to be in the military and transcribes it for a civilian audience in ninety-minute chunks. Sometimes, they fall flat on their face. But, on occasion, there are outstanding moments when they knock it out of the park. Most big-budget military films often put the focus on the Army or the Marines, leaving Navy films on the sidelines.
This is how powerful the Tsar Bomba would have been over America
In the heights of the Cold War, Soviet First Secretary Nikita Khrushchev banged his shoe against his desk as he vowed to show America at the United Nation General Assembly in 1960. The following year, on October 30th, the most massive nuclear explosion ever was detonated over Severny Island.
This is why most military aircraft have ashtrays
Just as with civilian flights, ashtrays on an aircraft make little sense. According to both civilian and military guidelines, smoking is forbidden while the aircraft is in flight. The no-smoking signs are a constant sting to every smoker with the urge to light up. And yet…there are ashtrays on aircraft. In 1990, the U.S. banned smoking on all flights. In 2000, international airlines followed suit. But before then, smoking was allowed on planes.
5 lesser-known facts about the most decorated soldier in American history
No other soldier in American history has ever come close to earning the level of respect dutifully given to Lieutenant Audie Murphy. To date, no other soldier has managed to earn every single award for valor — including the Medal of Honor, two Silver Stars, and three Bronze Stars. His legendary story has humble beginnings — he was a 5’5″, 17-year-old kid from Texas who tried to enlist with every branch and wasn’t admitted until he falsified his age to get into the Army.
5 reasons why soldiers and Marines get along so well
There’s a never-ending pissing contest between all of the branches of the U.S. Military but, at the end of the day, we’re all still one big, happy, dysfunctional family. We’ll always throw barbs at our brothers while we work with them because we expect the same jokes to be thrown our own way. No two branches better demonstrate this love/hate relationship than the Marines and the soldiers.
6 military scents that would make terrible scented candles
If there is one product on the face of the Earth that is the antithesis to the rigors and roughness of military life, it would have to the scented candle. But as “hardcore” as veterans once were, their loving better halves will always buy a sh*tload of them to decorate the house. This is a fight we cannot win. Veterans aren’t candle-averse because they hate the idea of smelling lavender spring sunshine or whatever.
9 epic ways you can troll your radio guy
Messing around with your fellow Joes is always good fun. It’s a lighthearted way of letting them know that they’re one of the guys. If you didn’t care about someone, you wouldn’t mess with them, right? Every unit, from combat arms to support, has a communications (commo/comms) person. They range from being tasked to operate the radio systems to being a full specialization, from grunt AF to fobbit.
Why getting in trouble early makes you a better leader
Getting in trouble while you’re a young private, airman, or seaman is extremely disheartening. The first time you get hemmed up by your superior feels like you’ve let your entire squad down. But there’s an old saying in the military that rings true with experience: “No one stays in without getting a few Article 15s.” Sure, maybe this doesn’t apply to everyone, but you can take a bit of solace knowing that even your crusty first sergeant was once a young, dumb kid.
Why Polynesian tattoos are probably more intense than yours
Tattoos are, by their very essence, pretty badass. They’re statements to the entire world that you’re willing to go through a few hours of pain to showcase your dedication to a certain thing. They’re messages that you’ll carry on your body forever. In the military, it’s not uncommon for troops to get a new bit of ink that celebrates their branch on the day they graduate from initial entry training.
This ridiculous WWI body armor somehow never managed to get fielded
One of the most magical feelings in the military is that moment you finally get back to the tent or barracks and can finally shed your Kevlar helmet and IOTV. That moment, when you can finally breathe and realize just how sweaty you were, is just plain glorious. As much of a slight pain in the ass (figuratively speaking, of course. Literally, it’s a pain in the lower back and knees) as today’s armor is, it’s come a long way.
5 sweet ways troops have shown love to those waiting for them
One of the most heartbreaking things troops must do is say goodbye to their loved ones before they deploy. If they’ve found a good one, they know their love will be waiting for them back home. Those troops will look cling on to that bittersweet silver-lining while their beloved waits, always dreading, on some level, the realities of war. It falls on the shoulders of the troops to let their love know that things will be okay.
Why the Siege of Bastogne was the defining moment for the 101st Airborne
One battle truly showed the world the fire that burns in the hearts of these soldiers. Put up against unfathomable odds and pushed to their absolute limit, the 101st stood their ground and turned the tides of war. This was the Siege of Bastogne. There’s no unit in the United States Army that can boast an impressive relationship with destiny like the Screaming Eagles of the 101st Airborne Division.
This is how secure the US Bullion Depository at Fort Knox really is
This inconspicuous Bullion Depository building just off the Dixie Highway may not seem too tough — until you realize it’s one of the most secure locations in the world. There’s a reason why “Fort Knox” is synonymous with high-end security. The U.S. Army post around the U.S. Bullion Depository, Fort Knox, isn’t that much different from any other military installation. To gain entry, a civilian can sign onto post at the visitor’s center.
6 effective ways to deal with a Blue Falcon in your unit
There’s always at least one in every unit. That one idiot who ruins everything for the rest of us. In the military, these clowns are given the moniker of “Blue Falcon.” Essentially, it’s a more professional way of calling someone a “buddy f*cker.” But, no matter how much of a screw-up they are, you’re going to be stuck with them until they ETS or PCS out of the unit, so it’s best if you just learn how to deal with them in one way or another. Of course, there are varying degrees of buddy f*cking.
The 5 types of troops you'll see heading to the bunker
One of the most common types of attacks troops will experience while deployed is a mortar attack, otherwise known as indirect fire. When this happens, protocol states that all troops must seek cover inside the nearest bunker. Depending on where a troop is stationed, they’ll run into a wide variety of troops from different units on their way to that bunker — all of whom react to IDF very differently. How a troop reacts says a lot about them as a warfighter and the kind of unit they’re in.
5 of the worst misconceptions to have when joining the military
Joining the military is a great opportunity for many young adults. There are countless benefits for those serve, ranging from financial security, means for obtaining a higher education, developing skills desired by future employers, and, most importantly, a way for someone to participate in something bigger than themselves. If you want to sign your name on the dotted line in hopes of making a better life for yourself — you’re making an excellent decision.
How this school teacher became a war chief in WWII
Few people have lived a life as hardcore and fulfilling as that of Dr. Joseph Medicine Crow. He attended college and became the first member of his tribe to obtain a master’s degree. While working on his doctorate, he taught at the Chemawa Indian School. Then, World War II broke out and everything changed. Before he knew it, he was a full-fledged war chief. Medicine Crow started working at a naval shipyard in Washington before enlisting in the Army in 1943.
6 unnecessary (but awesome) things you'll find in the barracks
Life in the barracks blows. You’re crammed into as tight of a space as possible so your superiors can keep an eye on you. There’s always something going on so you never get sleep. And you often have to share a tiny room with someone. But never underestimate the power of a bored private. If you can think of it, it’s probably going down in the barracks at this moment. While most of the shenanigans aren’t against any rules, they definitely make the lack of BAH worth it.
Bob Ross got these 5 qualities from the Air Force
Bob Ross might be one of the last names you’d think of when considering all the celebrities that have served. The videos of him “painting a happy little bush in the corner right there” exude calmness and tranquility — exactly the opposite of what you’d expect from a training instructor turned hardened, twenty-year First Sergeant turned retiree, but that’s exactly who he is.
Top ways troops deal with their bug problems
Insects carry disease, infect food stores, and bring loads of other concerns with them. Keeping an area bug-free is a top priority for maintaining good health and hygiene. The military has plenty of rules and regulations in place to help troops keep an area free of pests (which usually involves a lot of cleaning), but there are far more ingenious — and fun — ways to ward off these crawlers. Busting out a can of bug repellent A regular can of bug repellent works wonders.
This is the storied history behind the drill sergeant's campaign hat
The very moment a United States Armed Forces recruit steps foot off the bus, they’ll be greeted by a non-commissioned officer wearing a campaign hat and, in that moment, their life will change forever. Every branch in the Armed Forces (with exception of the Navy) uses a variation of the same, broad-brimmed hat. When you see someone wearing it, you know they’re dedicated to breaking the civilian out of young prospects and molding Uncle Sam a batch of new, capable warfighters.
How this 20th century Viking fought in 13 wars
The Vikings of old traveled far and wide. Their settlements ranged from Scandinavia to Italy to Canada and everyone, from the Byzantines to the Kievan Rus to the Iberians, feared them. Their blood runs deep inside Ivor Thord-Gray. Within the span of 31 years, he would wear nine different uniforms to fight in thirteen wars across five continents. He was born Thord Ivar Hallstrom in the Sodermalm district of Stockholm, Sweden in 1878.
To misconceptions civilians have about the Army
Whenever soldiers go on leave, it always plays out exactly the same: “Oh! You’re in the Army? My friend from work’s brother is in the Navy, so I know allllllll about it…” This is followed by a in-depth one-sided discussion about what people think they know about the Army, usually followed by some uncomfortable questions. Here’s a list of misconceptions Army members get that leave them sitting there thinking, “No, dude. Not even close.” 1.
Why 'Starship Troopers' is on every military reading list
It’s safe to say that the vast majority of troops and veterans today have seen the 1997 film, Starship Troopers. It’s an expertly crafted film and its tasteful use of special effects (for late 90s, anyway) was beyond astounding. The film is terrific in its own right, but Robert A. Heinlein’s novel, upon which the movie is (loosely) based, elevated the science fiction genre and has a place on nearly every single required reading list created by the United States military.
The most irritating things vets hear when they head off to college
Life in the military is fantastic, but being a lifer isn’t for everyone. One of the greatest pieces of legislative success for the veteran community was the creation of the GI Bill. It opened the door for countless veterans to finally spread their wings and get a leg up in the civilian marketplace, rewarding their service with a launchpad. Because of the GI Bill, many civilians who went straight to college from high school have their first interactions with a veteran. And it’s a good thing.
5 moments when you know the mess hall is about to serve the good stuff
Being a meal card holder has its benefits. It’s awesome to have the perfect excuse to get out at 1730. It’s food you get to enjoy without having to cook it. All you have do is overlook the fact that the meals are deducted from your pay when you’re assigned a barracks room and the fact that there’s barely any chow left by the time you get there —but outside of those details, it’s great! That optimism starts to wane, however, after eight months of eating the same seven entrees ad nauseam.
These are the rarest unofficial US Navy 'certificates'
The Navy has plenty of interesting and unique milestones for its sailors to strive for. Though they never appear on official paperwork and not all of them have ceremonies, they’re a fun bragging-rights challenge that sailors can use to flex on the uninitiated (aka ‘pollywogs’). By accomplishing one of several feats, sailors are inducted into an unofficial ‘order’ and, with that order, typically comes eligibility for a specific tattoo, or Navy certificates.
7 tactics in gaming that would result in a UCMJ hearing
When people play video games, they tend to breeze through any mundane moments just to keep the game moving along. After all, no one wants to spend $60 just to sit around and deal with the regular crap that comes with real life. In the real world, we have to deal with all that regular crap because there are typically pesky laws or social norms that prevent us from doing whatever we feel is easier — or more fun.
This is why the Army keeps the Specialist rank around
If you look at the enlisted ranking system put in place by every branch of the United States Armed Forces, everything makes a good deal of sense. You start at the bottom — generally at E-1, but there are ways to get in at a higher pay grade — and work your way up to a certain point where you become an NCO. Officers have their own linear path, starting at O-1, and warrant officers are half way between the two. But the Army has its very own conundrum with the E-4 ranks.
Why Swiss vets can keep their rifle after leaving the service
After troops from various militaries around the world finish their time in service, they turn their gear in, finalize their paperwork, and hang up their uniform for good. Swiss soldiers, however, can skip that last visit to the arms room and walk out with their service weapon in tow. Surprised? To the Swiss, this is just a part of the culture. This is a part of Switzerland’s Aggressive Neutrality Policy.
6 tips to help you get through Air Assault School
Many Soldiers seek Air Assault School as a simple way to get a skill badge for gloating rights. It’s only two weeks of sliding down ropes — how hard could it be? Kinda difficult, actually, if you’re not prepared. Being a dope-on-a-rope is the fun part, but cocky and unprepared soldiers will often get dropped before they reach that point. To get the opportunity to really learn what rotor wash is, you’re going to have to do a lot of work. There’s a lot more to the school than you might think.
Why enlisted servicemembers love 'Mustang' officers
There are many different routes to becoming an officer within the U.S. Armed Forces. Military academies and ROTC programs are common, but only one in-road immediately garners respect, admiration, and loyalty — we’re talking about Mustang officers. A ‘Mustang’ is a prior-service officer who did their time before jumping from the green side (enlisted) to the gold side (officers). You can often point them out in a crowd.
Why the US has a base 695 miles north of the Arctic Circle
Every military installation has its ups and downs. You could be assigned to a tropical paradise, but you can’t afford anything off-base. You could be assigned to a breathtaking foreign country, but learning the local language will take some time. Or, you could be assigned to Thule Air Base in Greenland, where there’s literally nothing but ice and rock for 65 miles (and, even then, it’s just a remote Eskimo village).
5 reasons why troops can't stand ring-knocking lieutenants
There are four types of officers troops will encounter, each with a mindset that corresponds with how they became an officer. First, you’ve got your mustangs, who were previously enlisted and jumped over to the officer side. Typically, troops love mustangs because they draw from NCO experience and understand enlisted life. Then you’ve got your OCS and ROTC officers who came into the military after college. They’re harmless and can usually be bent to the will of the platoon sergeant.
6 types of people you should avoid at your first civilian job
Your crusty ol’ Sergeant Major was partially right when he said that you’ll have a hard time out in the civilian world. Sure, it’s amazing to forget what 0500 is after setting your alarm clock to “8 am” and the overtime pay is nice, but everything would be a lot better if you didn’t have to deal with so many civilians. Not all of them are bad, though.
7 ways to tell if the new guy is obviously a CID agent
Within the Army’s military police is the Criminal Investigation Command. They’re like NCIS for the Army (the real one — not the TV show). They conduct investigations, collect criminal intelligence, provide forensic laboratory support, and, occasionally, they’re assigned to a unit if they suspect something is wrong. If CID catches wind of serious misconduct, they’ll insert an agent into a unit through which they’ll observe what’s really going on.
6 dos and don'ts you need to know to become a better marksman
Rifle marksmanship is one of the handful of skills that everyone in the military needs to master. It doesn’t matter if you’re an infantryman, a special operator, or an admin clerk in the Reserves, everyone needs to master the fundamentals of marksmanship. Being well-versed in marksmanship is what makes all of America’s warfighters, without exception, deadly in combat.
How one pilot became Santa Claus to the kids of West Berlin
After the Second World War ended, Germany was split in two. The Allies took control over Western Germany while the communists shrouded the eastern half behind the Iron Curtain. Berlin, Germany’s capital, was also famously split in two. The city is nestled deep into the heart of Eastern Germany, leaving the West Germans living there to fend for themselves in a war-torn city without supplies. Starting in June of 1948, the communists tried their best to cut West Berlin off from the outside world.
This is why these engineers burn their battalion colors every year
A unit’s colors are held in near-sacred regard by the chain of command. The seemingly simple piece of cloth is steeped in rich symbolism and represents nearly every award and conflict that the unit has ever seen. Even simply brushing against the unit colors while it’s hoisted at the battalion building could result in a younger soldier doing push-ups until sergeant major gets tired.
5 reasons why the AT-AT from Star Wars would be terrible in the real world
The Star Wars franchise is all about placing fantastical elements within in a sci-fi setting. In order to truly enjoy the films, you have to suspend your disbelief a little bit — otherwise it’ll look a lot like cosmic samurai fighting a faceless evil empire across a galaxy filled with people who magically speak the same language and function just fine without a space suit wherever they end up.
This is what your wardrobe on mandatory fun days says about you
For better or worse, you’re going to find out basically everything about your brothers- and sisters-in-arms. The longer you serve with them — the more field ops, the more deployments, and the more random BS — the more you’re going to learn all the tiny, little details about your fellow troops. But if you want a crash course on the personal life of any other troop, look no further than how they dress whenever they’re given the option to show up in civvies instead of the uniform.
How a single photograph allowed the Japanese emperor to stay in power
On September 2nd, 1945, the foreign affairs delegation of the Japanese Empire boarded the USS Missouri and signed the Japanese Instrument of Surrender under the guidance of Emperor Hirohito, finally putting an end to bloodiest war mankind has ever seen. From that moment on, the world and Japan could start to rebuild. The bombings of Hiroshima and Nagasaki forced Japan into an unconditional surrender, accepting all terms stated by the Potsdam Declaration.
This is why Screaming Eagles wear cards on their helmets
The pop culture lexicon often depicts troops from WWII and Vietnam as having a playing card, usually the Ace of Spades, strapped onto their helmet. Although the Vietnam-era “Death Card” is an over-exaggeration of Screaming Eagles believing the urban legend that Vietnamese feared the Spade symbol (they didn’t) and later as a calling card and anti-peace sign, it remains a symbol for unit identification. Most specifically within the 101st Airborne Division.
5 awesome foreign awards US troops are allowed to wear
You may be looking fresh with that stack of awards and badges, but cool flashy medals are reserved for the most prestigious of US military awards. But how do you stand out at your next unit ball or dress inspection? Rock some foreign ones, that’s how. Everything on this list is subjective and doesn’t cover every single foreign award authorized for troops. Even if you do, regulations dictate you’re only authorized to wear one foreign badge with other decorations in order of presentation.
This is why the 3rd amendment was so crucial for a post-Revolution US
Ask any American to list the rights enshrined by the United States Constitution and they’ll be awfully quick to tell you the first two. Hell, take a drive on any freeway in America and you’ll see a couple of bumper stickers supporting the right to free speech and right to bear arms.
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