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Articles by Mattythe Mouse
(14057830) Top hot mike moments that destroyed political careers, aka schadenfruede: Sweet SWEET schadenfruede
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(14041992) That's it then. Cancel the kitchen scraps for lepers and orphans, no more merciful beheadings, and call off Christmas
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FARK.com: (14036006) Conservatism and lolbertarianism are total destructive garbage. Alright, then why are liberal democracies so astonishingly violent? Oh. Oh no
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(14025024) Bondi to join Noem on Dancing with the Stars Under the Bus
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(14018696) Iran may lack the US' naval or air prowess, but their meme warfare troops are ELITE
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(14017378) Right-Wing blogger vs. the OG Wednesday Addams? I know where I am placing my money
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(14006742) "If the war drags on, the economy will be fine; it's only consumers that will suffer"
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(14002386) What you get when frat boys get their hands on an AI program
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Stinky yesterday: I get to pick GQP nominee for TX Senate. Stinky today: I get to pick new Ayatollah
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(13991848) Rubio trying to contain GOP revolt over Iran war
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Trump: "Tarriffs are just like transgenered athletes without voter ID". No word on Jake Tapper's analysis yet
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(13974146) Secretary Nursekiller, why are you shooting down mylar party balloons with lasers? Uhh, umm...*smokebomb*
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(13969136) Two senior European diplomats being investigated for ties to Jeffrey Epstein. Norway? Yes, way
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(13952778) Oh well, you can't have a Mar-a-Lago omelet bar without gunning down a few eggs
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(13947048) A look at the Minneapolis "Parents on Patrol" who use walkie talkies and whistles to protect schools from ICE
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(13945854) Board Of Peace full of Lords of War
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(13939488) Murderer Jonathan Ross might sue people who call him a murderer
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(13938316) ICE doesn't know who it is hiring
Offering a $50k sign up bonus for ICE is exactly the same. Paid blood donations, even in first world countries, are quite common.
(13938030) Stinky wants Progressives to solve his affordability problem for him, which makes sense since it's their hoax after all
Universal Public Healthcare - Americans spend $5 Trillion a year on healthcare, a significant portion of which is wasted on advertising and profit. We can drastically save Americans money by transitioning to a public care model. Universal Public Education - Free childcare, free higher education to all who want it. Not wonky means testing, no BS. Housing Market Control - stiff tax penalties for second homes, vacant properties, or any corporate owned properties that is held longer than 30 days.
Noem threatens Gavin Newsom: 'We're gonna come to you' with fraud probe, maybe even shoot your dog
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(13931194) And so it begins
Let them go. These people could easily be you or me or anyone we care about. It's not just Republicans affected by the end of the subsidies. Ok, and? Because every time we have tried to fix healthcare, Republicans have killed it. Every. Single. Time. We tried man. We gave it our best. Republicans said nope, they want it all burned down. Well the GOP won. They got their wish. We can't save them. Not anymore. And they clearly do not want to be saved. Republicans WANT THIS.
(13929978) Some guy made about $400,000 on Polymarket by betting that Maduro would be out of office by the end of January
If he isn't convicted by the kangaroo court he will mysteriously hang himself. Now, where are those Epstein files? No, but really, the thing I'm the most curious about this whole thing is what the fark Maduro's trial is going to look like. Because right now, I'm operating under the assumption that he will get a legitimate trial. And if that's the case... The Trump admin fails catastrophically every time they actually try and engage with the legal system.
(13926460) MAGA testosterone claims deflated by science
"You know that alpha males aren't real, right? That whole setting was based on a debunked study on wolves in captivity that were under duress, right?" "No, you're not understanding me... I'm an alpha male! I'm in a self-imposed cage and I'm scared!" "... Do you need a hug?" *Somber nod while one manly tear rolls down his cheek.* No, no. I said I'm an "alphamale" - A tamale wrapped breakfast cereal. Sometimes, I pronounce "female" like "tamale" to throw people off.
(13926410) They voted for this
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