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Articles by Peter Schlachte
Strengthening Partnerships for a Sustainable Future: Earthworks' Journey Through Relationship Assessments
“We see our relationship with Earthworks as a mutual partnership. Earthworks provides a needed service and technical expertise for us to achieve a citizen enforcement program.
Writer Reveals How To Create Advice Columns
Allie S. asks, “How do I write a serialized advice column that no one will follow?” Dear Allie, Admittedly, I take some offense with this question. You, Allie, may insinuate that no one follows my advice column, but I’ll have you know that I am Wake Forest’s and, dare I say, Winston-Salem’s single most-read advice columnist.
Last Resort Is The Hit Spring Break Destination
Jim R asks, “How do I plan the perfect spring break getaway?” Dear Jimmy, You’ve come to the right person. I’ve successfully evaded the FBI for nearly two months now, so you could say that I’m pretty good at getaways. Admittedly, I did have a brief scare last week in Cairo, but that was nothing that two camels and a bottle of Pantene anti-dandruff shampoo couldn’t solve. But Jim — you young and innocent student who definitely actually exists — I’m tired of running from the FBI.
Pick-Up Lines Evoke Feelings Of Love
Elizabeth B. asks, “How does one find love in the ZSR library?” Dear Elizabeth, It’s that time of year again: students stretch out on blankets across the quad, our classrooms are a chorus of coughs louder than any infirmary ward and as John Paul Young sang in his 1977 Australian disco hit, love is in the air. Yes, Valentine’s Day is fast approaching and you can almost smell the anxiety wafting from young couples across campus: how many roses are too many roses?
Registering A Pet At Wake Forest
Becca M asks, “How do I get a registered pet at Wake Forest?” Dear Becca, Times are dark here at Touching Tips. The FBI has framed me for REDACTEDCRIME, and I’ve been on the run for six weeks. I’ve hidden in barns, in warehouses, in garages, in the bed of Bradley Cooper’s Ford 150, but until now, I haven’t had access to a computer to continue this vital advice column. This question, however, deserves an answer no matter the personal danger it places me in.
Nikolas Dances With Elegance
Hayden Graser also contributed to this article. On an unspecified date in an unspecified location, Hayden Graser and Peter Schlachte had the opportunity to watch a Wake Forest ballet class practice the movements that they had perfected over the course of a semester. We were especially taken with the poetry-in-motion of a student named Nikolas, and we have spent weeks analyzing his efforts and digging into his history.
Tips On Acing Your Job Interviews
Elizabeth W asks, “What are your tips to ace my next job interview?” Dear Elizabeth, For sixteen years, I have been the proud owner of Madam Chirpington, a female sparrow and my dearest friend. Madam Chirpington would sing in the evenings — usually the Star Wars “Imperial March”, but occasionally Johann Bach’s “Symphony in G Minor.” Until last night, that is, when Madam Chirpington was eaten by a snake. Lizzie — I feel like I can call you Lizzie now that we’ve shared this special moment.
Mastering Thanksgiving With Family
Hayden G asks, “How do I deal with my relatives during Thanksgiving?” Dear Hayden, This is likely the most important and challenging question that I will ever answer. Allow me to begin with an anecdote: at age seven, I attended Thanksgiving with my cousins from Florida.
Having A Successful Gap Year
Mary Grace R. asks, “How do I prepare for life after Wake Forest?” I must open this column with an apology regarding my most recent advice. As my lawyer dutifully reminded me, it’s inadvisable to attend class naked on the first day of spring semester — that will likely result in imprisonment. I take full responsibility for my careless advice. On the bright side, the answer to your question relates closely to clothing.
An Easy Way To Dress To Impress
Nik S asks, “How do I dress to impress at Wake Forest?” As my lawyer frequently reminds me, there isn’t much that you can (legally) do while naked. Going to class is one of those things. So, to dress to impress, my first tip is to wear clothes -– literally any clothes. That might seem basic, but you didn’t witness Jimmy pee on Patricia’s Hello Kitty backpack in seventh grade. At Wake Forest, everyone but the DKE brothers are pretty good at not being naked in class.
Safe Autumn Dates To Have Inside
Christian G. asks, “Thanks to your Tinder tips, I met a real cutie! Now I need to know — what are your tips for romantic autumnal dates?” Admittedly, I’ve had an abysmal dating career in winter, spring and summer months, but I’ve wooed my way through 27 autumn dates. Each one ended with me married and raking leaves in my betrothed’s front lawn while she tossed Bud Lights at me like I was a cocker spaniel playing fetch.
How To Use Tinder At Wake Forest
Kia H. and Emma B. ask, “What are your tips for how to use Tinder at Wake Forest?” This is a fantastic question — very pertinent for a student body in which 77 percent of students are too afraid to use Tinder in case they match with Dean Shore. Let’s start with building the perfect profile: your picture is the first thing anyone will see on your Tinder, but it’s impossible to know if people will think you’re hot. This is why I strongly advise against posting pictures of yourself to Tinder.
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