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Articles by Rob Slack
Movie Review: Eternals
Eternals Directed by Chloe Zhao In Theatres Let’s get this out of the way up top. Eternals is not a good movie. It’s not a good comic book movie, it’s not a good action movie, it’s not a good Marvel movie. It somehow feels overstuffed and empty at the same time. It’s muddled and convoluted. It’s a bland and boring and bewildering mess. It’s overlong but even with an hour cut out of its running time, Eternal would probably still feel too long. So, what is Eternals about?
Movie Review: Eternals
Eternals Directed by Chloe Zhao In Theatres Let’s get this out of the way up top. Eternals is not a good movie. It’s not a good comic book movie, it’s not a good action movie, it’s not a good Marvel movie. It somehow feels overstuffed and empty at the same time. It’s muddled and convoluted. It’s a bland and boring and bewildering mess. It’s overlong but even with an hour cut out of its running time, Eternal would probably still feel too long. So, what is Eternals about?
Movie Review: Dune
Dune Directed by Denis Villeneuve In theatres and streaming Denis Villeneuve’s adaptation of Frank Herbert’s 1965 novel Dune is a singular experience. It’s not a remake of David Lynch’s 1984 adaptation, but it does have some love for that magnificent failure. And it’s not drawing anything from Alejandro Jodorowsky’s planned but never filmed adaption, but it also has some love for that magnificent acid trip, that bewilderingly could-have-been.
Movie Review: Dune
Dune Directed by Denis Villeneuve In theatres and streaming Denis Villeneuve’s adaptation of Frank Herbert’s 1965 novel Dune is a singular experience. It’s not a remake of David Lynch’s 1984 adaptation, but it does have some love for that magnificent failure. And it’s not drawing anything from Alejandro Jodorowsky’s planned but never filmed adaption, but it also has some love for that magnificent acid trip, that bewilderingly could-have-been.
Movie Review: The Suicide Squad
The Suicide Squad is just about as much fun as a person can have in a theatre without getting arrested The Suicide Squad Directed by James Gunn In Theatres Let’s get this out of the way first – James Gunn’s The Suicide Squad is just about as much fun as a person can have in a theatre without getting arrested. The pacing is take-no-prisoners Jurassic Park. The humour is top shelf profane and irreverent.
Movie Review: The Suicide Squad
The Suicide Squad is just about as much fun as a person can have in a theatre without getting arrested The Suicide Squad Directed by James Gunn In Theatres Let’s get this out of the way first – James Gunn’s The Suicide Squad is just about as much fun as a person can have in a theatre without getting arrested. The pacing is take-no-prisoners Jurassic Park. The humour is top shelf profane and irreverent.
Movie Review: The Tomorrow War
The Tomorrow War Directed by Chris McKay Steaming on Amazon Prime The Tomorrow War is like the Golden Retriever of movies. On the surface it seems kind of dumb, it wants to give you unconditional love, wants to have all of the fun, and asks for nothing in return except maybe a belly rub and couple of cookies. Which is kind of fitting as it stars the Golden Retriever of actors.
Movie Review: The Tomorrow War
The Tomorrow War Directed by Chris McKay Steaming on Amazon Prime The Tomorrow War is like the Golden Retriever of movies. On the surface it seems kind of dumb, it wants to give you unconditional love, wants to have all of the fun, and asks for nothing in return except maybe a belly rub and couple of cookies. Which is kind of fitting as it stars the Golden Retriever of actors.
Movie Review: Things Heard and Seen
Things Heard & Seen Directed by Shari Springer and Robert Pulcin Streaming on Netflix Netflix’s Things Heard & Seen wants to be The Shining set in a farmhouse, it wants to be The Amityville Horror set in the Hudson Valley, it wants to be The Conjuring with art school pretensions. It wants to be many things and for a good chunk of its running time it’s okay, it’s enjoyable. It’s good.
Movie Review: Things Heard and Seen
Things Heard & Seen Directed by Shari Springer and Robert Pulcin Streaming on Netflix Netflix’s Things Heard & Seen wants to be The Shining set in a farmhouse, it wants to be The Amityville Horror set in the Hudson Valley, it wants to be The Conjuring with art school pretensions. It wants to be many things and for a good chunk of its running time it’s okay, it’s enjoyable. It’s good.
Movie Review: Things Heard and Seen
Things Heard & Seen Directed by Shari Springer and Robert Pulcin Streaming on Netflix Netflix’s Things Heard & Seen wants to be The Shining set in a farmhouse, it wants to be The Amityville Horror set in the Hudson Valley, it wants to be The Conjuring with art school pretensions. It wants to be many things and for a good chunk of its running time it’s okay, it’s enjoyable. It’s good.
Movie review: Thunder Force
Thunder Force Directed by Ben Falcone Streaming on Netflix It’s not like Thunder Force is a bad movie, it really isn’t bad. Yes, it’s lazy and predictable, and stretches too far for some jokes, not far enough for others. And there are a lot of moments when the leads look bored. But it’s not a bad movie. It’s not good, either. It’s all kind of m’eh.
Movie review: Thunder Force
'Thunder Force' is a superhero comedy with no affection for superheroes and little comedy Thunder Force Directed by Ben Falcone Streaming on Netflix It’s not like Thunder Force is a bad movie, it really isn’t bad. Yes, it’s lazy and predictable, and stretches too far for some jokes, not far enough for others. And there are a lot of moments when the leads look bored. But it’s not a bad movie. It’s not good, either. It’s all kind of m’eh.
Movie Review: Zack Snyder's Justice League
The new cut of Justice League is better than the theatre release of 'Justice League'. Unfortunately, that doesn’t make it a good movie Zack Snyder’s Justice League Directed by Zack Snyder Streaming on Crave Let’s get this out of the way first – the new cut of Justice League is better than the theatre release of Justice League. Unfortunately, that doesn’t make it a good movie. It’s bigger and noisier and is just More in every way possible than the theatre release.
Movie Review: Zack Snyder's Justice League
The new cut of Justice League is better than the theatre release of 'Justice League'. Unfortunately, that doesn’t make it a good movie Zack Snyder’s Justice League Directed by Zack Snyder Streaming on Crave Let’s get this out of the way first – the new cut of Justice League is better than the theatre release of Justice League. Unfortunately, that doesn’t make it a good movie. It’s bigger and noisier and is just More in every way possible than the theatre release.
Movie Review: Zack Snyder's Justice League
The new cut of Justice League is better than the theatre release of Justice League. Unfortunately, that doesn’t make it a good movie Zack Snyder’s Justice League Directed by Zack Snyder Streaming on Crave Let’s get this out of the way first – the new cut of Justice League is better than the theatre release of Justice League. Unfortunately, that doesn’t make it a good movie. It’s bigger and noisier and is just More in every way possible than the theatre release.
Movie Review: Zack Snyder's Justice League
The new cut of Justice League is better than the theatre release of 'Justice League'. Unfortunately, that doesn’t make it a good movie Zack Snyder’s Justice League Directed by Zack Snyder Streaming on Crave Let’s get this out of the way first – the new cut of Justice League is better than the theatre release of Justice League. Unfortunately, that doesn’t make it a good movie. It’s bigger and noisier and is just More in every way possible than the theatre release.
Year in review: Looking back at film, the 2019 edition
2019 was a particularly undefinable film year. We watched remakes and reboots and sequels and original properties and Robert De Niro play a 35 year old. We watched some great films, some bad films, and some that were just m'eh. Let's get to it. The M'eh M'eh. It's a movie that isn't truly bad, it's not a lack of craft or technological expertise or whatever that makes it m'eh. The film just kind of sits there and everyone involved insists that it was an achievement but really, it's just kind of m'eh.
Movie review: Outside the Wire
'Outside the Wire' is not as much fun as a movie about a sentient, cussing, ridiculously handsome android should be Outside the Wire Directed by Mikael Hafstrom Streaming on Netflix Outside the Wire is like one of those direct-to-video movies you would find on the shelves at Blockbuster or Rogers or wherever you liked to rent movies from back when we used to do that sort of thing. Starring a recognizable face, someone whose IMDB includes Oscar winners and giant franchise blockbusters.
Movie Review: Mank
Mank Directed by David Fincher Steaming on Netflix The first time I saw Citizen Kane was on Elwy Yost’s Saturday Night at the Movies on TVO. I remember him talking about Kane and Orson Welles and Greg Tolland and Robert Wise and Bernard Herrmann and deep focus and temporal jump-cuts and camera placement being as important as the dialogue.
Movie Review: The Trial of the Chicago 7
Don't look to The Trial of the Chicago 7 when write your essay about this moment in history. Do look to this movie as great art inspired by a moment in history The Trial of the Chicago 7 Directed by Aaron Sorkin Streaming on Netflix When I wrote about Molly's Game I mentioned that an Aaron Sorkin screenplay is so much more than its elevator pitch. Social Network isn't a Facebook movie. Molly's Game isn't a poker movie. Moneyball is more than a baseball movie. Steve Jobs isn't an Apple movie.
Movie Review: Enola Holmes
Enola Holmes Directed by Harry Bradbeer Streaming on Netflix Enola Holmes is, in a word, fun. Sure, there are moments of darkness and some of the violence feels a little too real, but at the end of the day, when the credits roll, Enola Holmes is fun. And if this curmudgeon can have fun, I'm kinda thinking the target audience might have some fun as well. The movie is light and energetic and probably won't solve any of the world's problems. But that's fine.
Movie Review: Tenet
Tenet Directed by Christopher Nolan In Theatres I went to a movie theatre, the first time since March. It shouldn't be a big deal and in a normal world it wouldn't be. But this has been a year of murder hornets and fire tornados and square-dancing hurricanes. A year of death and mayhem and chaos and confusion and anger and sadness and global civil unrest and a pandemic the likes of which hasn't been seen in over a century.
Movie Review: Spenser Confidential
Spenser Confidential Directed by Peter Berg On Netflix So, yeah. What a change a couple of weeks can make. 2 weeks ago I was counting down the days until the new Bond film and A Quiet Place 2. Now, we find ourselves self-quarantining, self-distancing, self-isolating, and washing our hands more often than Howard Hughes. Some of us are panicking and some of us are cautious and some of us are buying enough toilet paper to build tree forts.
Movie Review: Spenser Confidential
Spenser Confidential Directed by Peter Berg On Netflix So, yeah. What a change a couple of weeks can make. 2 weeks ago I was counting down the days until the new Bond film and A Quiet Place 2. Now, we find ourselves self-quarantining, self-distancing, self-isolating, and washing our hands more often than Howard Hughes. Some of us are panicking and some of us are cautious and some of us are buying enough toilet paper to build tree forts.
Movie Review: Spenser Confidential
We're all in this together, so let's kick back for some 'Spenser Confidential' fun. After you wash your hands. Spenser Confidential Directed by Peter Berg On Netflix So, yeah. What a change a couple of weeks can make. 2 weeks ago I was counting down the days until the new Bond film and A Quiet Place 2. Now, we find ourselves self-quarantining, self-distancing, self-isolating, and washing our hands more often than Howard Hughes.
Movie Review: The Invisible Man
The Invisible Man Directed by Leigh Whannell In Theatres Let's get this out of the way first, I know you're busy avoiding work and relatives and friends and a world gone mad. So let's get this out of the way - I like The Invisible Man a lot. How much? Well, it is among my favourite adaptations of H.G. Wells's 1897 novel.
Movie Review: The Invisible Man
The Invisible Man Directed by Leigh Whannell In Theatres Let's get this out of the way first, I know you're busy avoiding work and relatives and friends and a world gone mad. So let's get this out of the way - I like The Invisible Man a lot. How much? Well, it is among my favourite adaptations of H.G. Wells's 1897 novel.
Movie Review: The Invisible Man
If what you're looking for is fear and paranoia and edge-of-your-seat suspense, The Invisible Man is more than what you're looking for The Invisible Man Directed by Leigh Whannell In Theatres Let's get this out of the way first, I know you're busy avoiding work and relatives and friends and a world gone mad. So let's get this out of the way - I like The Invisible Man a lot. How much? Well, it is among my favourite adaptations of H.G. Wells's 1897 novel.
Movie Review: Birds of Prey (And the Fantabulous Emancipation of One Harley Quinn)
Birds of Prey (And the Fantabulous Emancipation of One Harley Quinn) Directed by Cathy Yan In Theatres Let's get this out of the way upfront, first and foremost, and most importantly, Birds of Prey (And the Fantabulous Emancipation of One Harley Quinn) is dump trucks full of fun. It's almost as much fun as a dozen Golden Lab puppies. And it's also utterly insane. It's nuts. it's completely bonkers and deranged and psychotic and unhinged. It's the film equivalent of taking Lemmy quantities of speed.
Movie Review: Birds of Prey (And the Fantabulous Emancipation of One Harley Quinn)
Birds of Prey (And the Fantabulous Emancipation of One Harley Quinn) Directed by Cathy Yan In Theatres Let's get this out of the way upfront, first and foremost, and most importantly, Birds of Prey (And the Fantabulous Emancipation of One Harley Quinn) is dump trucks full of fun. It's almost as much fun as a dozen Golden Lab puppies. And it's also utterly insane. It's nuts. it's completely bonkers and deranged and psychotic and unhinged. It's the film equivalent of taking Lemmy quantities of speed.
Movie Review: Birds of Prey (And the Fantabulous Emancipation of One Harley Quinn)
Birds of Prey is a kaleidoscope of insanity and violence and profanity and gore and glitter Birds of Prey (And the Fantabulous Emancipation of One Harley Quinn) Directed by Cathy Yan In Theatres Let's get this out of the way upfront, first and foremost, and most importantly, Birds of Prey (And the Fantabulous Emancipation of One Harley Quinn) is dump trucks full of fun. It's almost as much fun as a dozen Golden Lab puppies. And it's also utterly insane. It's nuts.
Movie Review: Dolittle
Dolittle Directed by Stephen Gaghan In Theatres And here we find ourselves, in the opening weeks of a new year, a new decade, talking about Dolittle. And what is Dolittle? It's not a sequel, it's not a reboot or a remake. What is it then? Glad you asked. It is a very loose adaptation of a 98 year old children's book. A very broken and disjointed and tone deaf loose adaptation of a 98 year old children's book. Some kids may like it. Or rather, they may like pieces of it. And there are some funny bits.
Movie Review: Dolittle
Dolittle Directed by Stephen Gaghan In Theatres And here we find ourselves, in the opening weeks of a new year, a new decade, talking about Dolittle. And what is Dolittle? It's not a sequel, it's not a reboot or a remake. What is it then? Glad you asked. It is a very loose adaptation of a 98 year old children's book. A very broken and disjointed and tone deaf loose adaptation of a 98 year old children's book. Some kids may like it. Or rather, they may like pieces of it. And there are some funny bits.
Movie Review: Dolittle
Dolittle Directed by Stephen Gaghan In Theatres And here we find ourselves, in the opening weeks of a new year, a new decade, talking about Dolittle. And what is Dolittle? It's not a sequel, it's not a reboot or a remake. What is it then? Glad you asked. It is a very loose adaptation of a 98 year old children's book. A very broken and disjointed and tone deaf loose adaptation of a 98 year old children's book. Some kids may like it. Or rather, they may like pieces of it. And there are some funny bits.
Year in review: Looking back at film, the 2019 edition
2019 was a particularly undefinable film year. We watched remakes and reboots and sequels and original properties and Robert De Niro play a 35 year old. We watched some great films, some bad films, and some that were just m'eh. Let's get to it. The M'eh M'eh. It's a movie that isn't truly bad, it's not a lack of craft or technological expertise or whatever that makes it m'eh. The film just kind of sits there and everyone involved insists that it was an achievement but really, it's just kind of m'eh.
Year in review: Looking back at film, the 2019 edition
2019 was a particularly undefinable film year. We watched remakes and reboots and sequels and original properties and Robert De Niro play a 35 year old. We watched some great films, some bad films, and some that were just m'eh. Let's get to it. The M'eh M'eh. It's a movie that isn't truly bad, it's not a lack of craft or technological expertise or whatever that makes it m'eh. The film just kind of sits there and everyone involved insists that it was an achievement but really, it's just kind of m'eh.
Movie Review: Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker
Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker Directed by J.J. Abrams In Theatres Let's get this out of the way up top: I like Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker, I really do. It's full of energy, it never lets the gas up. The performances, especially the leads, are all top shelf. Carrie Fisher, through the use of archival footage and such, is on a giant screen one last time and that is a good thing. The emotional journeys are moving and fulfilling.
Movie Review: Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker
Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker Directed by J.J. Abrams In Theatres Let's get this out of the way up top: I like Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker, I really do. It's full of energy, it never lets the gas up. The performances, especially the leads, are all top shelf. Carrie Fisher, through the use of archival footage and such, is on a giant screen one last time and that is a good thing. The emotional journeys are moving and fulfilling.
Movie Review: The Irishman
The Irishman Directed by Martin Scorsese On Netflix I'm not going to fall down the rabbit hole of what is true and what isn't true in the tales of Frank Sheeran, whether it's Charles Brandt's 2004 book I Heard You Paint Houses or Martin Scorsese's The Irishman.
Movie Review: The Irishman
The Irishman Directed by Martin Scorsese On Netflix I'm not going to fall down the rabbit hole of what is true and what isn't true in the tales of Frank Sheeran, whether it's Charles Brandt's 2004 book I Heard You Paint Houses or Martin Scorsese's The Irishman.
Movie Review: Ford v Ferrari
Ford v Ferrari Directed by James Mangold In Theatres And as I was leaving the theatre, James Burton's Polk Salad Annie still ringing in my ears, I overheard a young couple walking behind me. "That was sad," she said. "Yes," he said, "but great." I had to silently agree. Ford v Ferrari is a sad, great movie. But then she said it again. And again. There was shock and grief in her voice. And then I suddenly realized that not everyone knows the story of the 1966 24 Hours of Le Mans.
Movie Review: Ford v Ferrari
Ford v Ferrari Directed by James Mangold In Theatres And as I was leaving the theatre, James Burton's Polk Salad Annie still ringing in my ears, I overheard a young couple walking behind me. "That was sad," she said. "Yes," he said, "but great." I had to silently agree. Ford v Ferrari is a sad, great movie. But then she said it again. And again. There was shock and grief in her voice. And then I suddenly realized that not everyone knows the story of the 1966 24 Hours of Le Mans.
Movie Review: Doctor Sleep
Doctor Sleep Directed by Mike Flanagan In Theatres Let's get this out of the way first - I like Doctor Sleep. A lot. It scared me, moved me, fascinated me, horrified me. It takes chances and goes places that very few genre films dare to go. And I say this as someone who regards The Shining as not only the one of the greatest horror films of Ever, but as one of the greatest films of Ever. In my oh, so, humble opinion, The Shining is perfection.
Movie review: The Laundromat
The Laundromat Directed by Steven Soderbergh On Netflix Steven Soderbergh’s latest, The Laundromat, is a criticism of late-stage capitalism that is nothing like Adam McKay’s The Big Short.
Movie review: The Laundromat
The Laundromat Directed by Steven Soderbergh On Netflix Steven Soderbergh’s latest, The Laundromat, is a criticism of late-stage capitalism that is nothing like Adam McKay’s The Big Short.
Movie Review: Joker
Joker Directed by Todd Phillips In Theatres Let's get this out of the way first. Joaquin Phoenix saves Joker. Without Mr. Phoenix, Joker would be kind of dull. Without Mr. Phoenix, there would be no danger. As it is, even with Mr. Phoenix Joker, isn't as smart as it thinks it is. At times it feels like first year psych mixed with first year philosophy, with a dash of some half read Thomas Harris novels. It often mistakes nihilism for dark, predictable for edgy. Humourless for serious.
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