Bobby Box
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Articles by Bobby Box
The Bush is Back
The state of a gay guy’s bush has been a barometer of the times for decades. Back when guys were flipping through sticky porno mags in the ‘70s and ‘80s, most men looked like some variant of Burt Reynolds—the reigning sex bomb of the time: boastfully bushy both above the waist and below. After the rigid gender and sexual norms of the 1950s, the sexual revolution encouraged people (including gay men) to reject the idea that the body needed to be cleancut, well-shaved, and scrubbed down.
"T4T relationships have the same problems as everyone else"
Intimacy Ahead of the release of her memoir ‘Love in Exile’, Shon Faye talks T4T relationships, the universality of heartbreak, and her hopes for her male readers. When Shon Faye’s debut book, The Transgender Issue: An Argument for Justice, was published in September 2021, it blew fresh air into a public discourse about transgender people that had become increasingly stale, repetitive and toxic.
The Complete Field Guide to Male Sex Toys
Nota bene: All products in this article are independently selected and vetted by InsideHook editors. If you buy something, we may earn an affiliate commission. At a glance, the male sex toy landscape is scarce. A motorized cock ring here, a pocket pussy there and you’ve essentially covered half the category. If you’re a modern man undeterred by toxic masculinity, you might even indulge in some anal sex toys and experience the male equivalent of a G-spot orgasm.
Inside One Night’s sportswear night, celebrating sapphic scallies in all their forms
London’s sapphic nightlife scene is thriving – with nights like WET and new venues like La Camionera, celebrating dykes, bi femmes and the FLINTA community. For those looking for something more adventurous, One Night Parties is a need-to-know. Founded informally in 2016, before running from equipped spaces in 2019, the party was born out of a “love for sexual spaces, but a disdain for entitled men”.
LGBTQ+ wellbeing ad fitness
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“Y’all know I’m going boysober for a year”: how queer Gen Z rebranded celibacy
Love & Sex It’s no secret that LGBTQIA+ youth are ditching dating apps. Now, it looks like they’re leaving behind hook-up culture and going “sober”, aka celibate, when it comes to sex and relationships. We ask LGBTQIA+ Gen Zers why. WORDS BY ZOYA RAZA-SHEIKH HEADER DESIGN BY YOSEF PHELAN If you didn’t know, we’re in a “sex recession”.
What does fraysexual mean? The queer community weighs in
Life “In a most general sense, the more a fraysexual gets to know a person, the less sexually desirable that individual becomes” WORDS BY BOBBY BOX HEADER BY YOSEF PHELAN If you’re someone who routinely finds yourself becoming less sexually attracted to somebody the better you get to know them, there is a chance you may be fraysexual.
expert advice and recommendations
Love & Sex If you’re a newbie to the world of strap-ons, it’s time to listen up. Keep reading for a full guide – for everyone and anyone who’s curious – on how to use a strap-on. WORDS BY BETH ASHLEY HEADER DESIGN BY ANISA CLEAVER Much like scissoring, the almighty strap-on is such an iconic symbol of queerness that even if you’ve never used one before, chances are, you’ve seen one in a film or joked about them with your friends before.
expert advice and recommendations
Originals If you’re a newbie to the world of strap-ons, it’s time to listen up. Keep reading for a full guide – for everyone and anyone who’s curious – on how to use a strap-on. WORDS BY BETH ASHLEY HEADER DESIGN BY ANISA CLEAVER Much like scissoring, the almighty strap-on is such an iconic symbol of queerness that even if you’ve never used one before, chances are, you’ve seen one in a film or joked about them with your friends before.
5 ways to cope with the distressing news cycle as a trans+ person
Originals GAY TIMES worked with Galop and Not a Phase to help trans and non-binary people struggling with distressing stories in the media. WORDS BY CONOR CLARK HEADER BY ANISA CLEAVER From stories about another transphobic incident to social commentators debating what a woman is, the news can often feel overwhelming to look at for transgender and non-binary people.
Why “anal training” is paramount when bottoming
While it’s a concept many might not be familiar with, it’s significant to a well-prepared and pleasurable anal sex experience. This is especially true if you’re new to anal sex, you’re looking to graduate to larger sizes or more extreme acts like fisting, or it’s been a while since you’ve last had something in your ass. Anal training is the practice of gradually dilating your booty hole at a comfortable pace so you don’t experience pain or discomfort during anal intercourse.
Paloma Faith: ‘If my career ends because of being an LGBTQ+ ally, good riddance’
Originals Paloma Faith on her new album The Glorification of Sadness, being a fierce ally to the LGBTQIA+ community and calling Rishi Sunak a “c**t”. WORDS BY CONOR CLARK PHOTOGRAPHY BY YAN WASIUCHNIK “I’ve been very vocal about lots of things and I don’t regret anything I’ve stood up for because it’s all how I feel,” says Paloma Faith, who has never shied away from speaking out about the things that matter most to her.
8 Things All Guys Feel - But Are Too Embarrassed To Admit
These are what men are insecure about. By PopSugar Last updated on Sep 19, 2023 Photo: Joshua Resnick, siriwannapatphotos, dashapetrenkophotos | Canva By Bobby Box Societally speaking, men are not believed to be the most emotional beings. Man is a statue, solid in form and relatively expressionless. Because of this societal presumption, men tend to be embarrassed easily when we stray from prospective "roles," and the fact of the matter is, we shouldn't.
The Real Reason Men Inadvertently Screw Up Relationships, According To An Expert
Here's why guys won't commit. By PopSugar Last updated on Sep 17, 2023 By Bobby Box Growing up, I always felt I approached relationships differently from most. My philosophy was: if I was going to date somebody, I had to be almost 100 percent sure I'd marry them. If not, then it was a waste of time. I figured most people regarded dating this way. But I know many people who've dated others knowing full well they wouldn't marry the person they were with.
13 Things You Don't Even Realize You Do (That Make Him Fall In Love)
By Bobby Box Women are incredibly beautiful beings. Everything from your shape to your form and the way you carry yourselves — guys appreciate all of it. Trust me. But I will admit there are some things you can do that exceed simple appreciation and take us over the edge. These things aren't grand gestures by any means, just small things you do that make an impact on us whether you know it does or not. My job here is to let you know what these things are.
The Bottom of Bottoming - Tips for Bottoming
Anal sex is the shit. Given the subject matter, this might not seem like the best verbiage, but I chose this phrasing to make a point. You see, pain and poop are two of the most common misconceptions people attribute to anal sex. Our shitty sex ed curriculum... doesn’t even flirt with the idea that our succulent peaches can be an incredible source of sexual pleasure.
How to Show Shoppers the Many Uses of Sex Position Aids
Odds are your shoppers have gotten good at finding the vibrators, strokers, lubricants and condoms they need. Over the last five years, these items have received incredible amounts of media attention, which has helped normalize shopping for and enjoying them. Some product categories, however, are still left out of sex advice columns and top-10 lists — even when they could potentially have a huge impact on shoppers’ sex lives.
Why Condoms Are Essential Goods for Adult Stores
With drugstores, big-box stores and even supermarkets now boasting condom selections, it can be tempting for adult retailers to turn their attention to bigger-ticket items, leaving their safer-sex sections a bit anemic — or even nonexistent. Though it’s easy to see how and why this happens, it’s bad for business. No matter what else your adult retail establishment is known for, it is absolutely imperative that you carry condoms.
A Look at Importance of Working With and Supporting Sex Educators
Positive reviews, great customer service and of course, high-quality products, all help build and maintain trust, and therefore have a measurable impact on sales — but so does working with accredited sex educators, therapists, academics and experts. Influencers and celebrities with walls full of Grammys can bring fantastic exposure, but for earning trust and building lasting connections with reputable journalists, you want people with walls full of sexy, sexy diplomas. Here’s why.
How to Sell Anal Toys to People New to the Category
Despite great strides in sexual wokeness, anal sex is still shrouded in stigma. A toxic mix of homophobia, religion, and even law — let’s not forget that “sodomy” is still illegal in 12 states — has contributed to the belief that anal sex is some lewd, unnatural act reserved for gay men. None of that is remotely true, of course, and those in the know recognize that anal sex is as natural and pleasurable as any other form of consensual sex.
How To Spice Up a Blowjob: 8 Tips to Try
Everybody and their discreet neighbor thinks they give great head. And while I’m absolutely here for this sexual confidence, I’d be remiss not to say it’s a bit delusional. I mean, if everybody gives a good blowjob, then why have I received so many mediocre ones? I say “mediocre” because I’ve never received a bad blowjob in my life. Have some been toothy? Sure. Have I wanted some to end but didn’t have the heart to tell them? Absolutely. But I wouldn’t consider any of these experiences bad.
Gay Sex Ed: CONSENT Above All | Grindr
Trigger warning: The following content discusses sexual consent, rape and assault. In my personal experience as a sex writer and educator, the majority of queer men (or men who have sex with men) I speak and consult with acknowledge that they’ve been a victim of some sort of non-consensual sexual circumstance. Because this hypersexual behavior is so common in our community, we have a tendency to shrug it off as a shared experience, and never really address the issue.
How Loveless by Alice Oseman helped me discover my aromanticism
Last November, my university’s LGBTQ+ Society book club decided that our next book would be Loveless by Alice Oseman. Everyone knows Alice as the author of the bestselling graphic novel turned Netflix hit Heartstopper, and I was excited to read some of her work. Loveless centres on Georgia, a girl who starts university having never kissed anyone or had a crush before, but is convinced she’ll find love one day.
How to Suck Balls and Play with Testicles (NEW)
b-Vibe's new brand ambassador and resident sex expert, Bobby Box, shares his teabag testimonial on how to play with testicles and master The Art of Ball Sucking in his first Queeries. Read on! When you're giving oral sex, balls, they're just kind of hanging there, observing. So what are you supposed to do with them? Give them a tug? Pop them in your mouth? Ignore them? Each of these answers can be correct, depending on the individual, but many people seem to be into it.
16 LGBTQ+ Celebrities Who Came Out This Year
In March, at Essence’s Black Women in Hollywood Awards, the King Richard actress wore a red Dolce & Gabbana jacket with the word “QUEER” in shiny rhinestones on the left arm. A few months later, the Oscar nominee shared with Variety that she identifies as bisexual. Opening up about her qualms with heteronormativity in Hollywood, she told the outlet that she wants to see more onscreen portrayals of Black queer sexuality. “There aren’t a lot of novels about Black queer women.
How a “Grass Is Greener” Mentality Ruined My First Queer Relationship
I met Jacob in 2019 on a press trip to upstate New York. We shared a mutual attraction and spent the night getting to know each other over cocktails as distant crickets chimed in the forest. We discussed the merits of Lindsay Lohan and Heidi Montag’s music careers, then later in his cabin, got entangled in each other’s bodies. After spending an extra day with him, I flew home and we spoke every day. I was ecstatic to make our relationship official, despite living in separate countries.
Gay Sex Ed: Gift Guide
Here are the best toys and products that’ll help get you on the naughty list. June 23, 2025 Table of Contents TABLA DE CONTENIDOS ÍNDICE DE CONTEÚDO As a festive Mariah Carey declared atop a Peloton the minute the thermostat went below 50 degrees, the holidays are officially upon us. A time where dark nights are illuminated by Christmas lights, our homes are decorated with wreaths and tinsel, and the coziness of cuffing season proves gays can commit, at least until warmer weather returns.
These are the best sex toys for 'sides'
Since I first wrote about the concept of sides last year, the term’s recognition has exploded. Sides—a term for people who prefer less invasive sexual acts like oral, frottage and mutual masturbation over penetration—has since appeared in The Guardian, The Daily Beast and is one of the latest entries in the terminology of homosexuality on Wikipedia.
Choose Your Words Wisely: Appropriate Language For HIV
HIV is now considered a manageable health condition, yet the stigma remains disappointingly prevalent, even within our community. From the moment we open our apps, we see this ignorance is in plain sight, with words like “clean” and “DDF” (which means drug and disease free) tarnishing countless profiles. This is unacceptable behavior and far too common. People living with HIV deserve to be on these apps without prejudice and participate in casual hookups just as much as anyone else.
A love letter to video game vixens
As kids, my friends and I often sat in a semicircle around the Nintendo 64. My eyes would always rapidly scan the screen for the woman in a video game’s character select menu. Friends would inquire as to why I always chose “the girl,” and I’d anxiously retort that their abilities best matched my playing style. Of course, I was being a bold-faced liar. Choosing “the girl” was simply my way of coping.
‘Sides’ Are Redefining How People Identify Sex
In May of this year, Grindr, the popular hook-up app for men who have sex with men (MSM), announced that it will be adding ‘sides’ as an option on user profiles. It generated headlines for becoming the first, and still the only app, to do so, representing a significant population that has long been ignored. As a regular sex columnist for Grindr myself it made me proud that the platform was allowing a population of people to come together and help alter the way we identify sex in 2022.
Your Queer Weekly Horoscope: August 29-September 4
Welcome to your Queer Weekly Horoscope, a bite-sized look at the coming days broken down by your zodiac sign. It’s a bridge-crossing week, August into September. Celestial bodies don’t care about human divisions of time, but we do, and this turn of the calendar page signifies a mental shift from summer to autumn.
Trans Skateboarder Leo Baker on Quitting the Olympics and His New Netflix Documentary
In early 2020, Leo Baker made the gut-wrenching decision to quit the Olympics. Having won countless skateboarding competitions from a young age, qualifying for the Tokyo Summer Games was a dream come true, and the culmination of years of hard work. It also offered a historic chance to introduce the once-outsider sport to a global audience; skateboarding had never before made an Olympic appearance.
Gay Sex Ed: HIV in 2022 — BLOOP
HIV educator, researcher, and advocate Kalob Gossett, believes much of this progress can be attributed to the sustained increase in PrEP use. “According to the CDC, preliminary data shows that in 2020 about 25% of the 1.2 million people in the U.S. for whom PrEP is recommended were prescribed it, compared to only about three percent in 2015,” he tells Grindr.
Gay Sex Ed: HIV in 2022
There is no denying the progress being made toward HIV treatment and prevention. In 2019, the CDC published that an estimated 34,800 new HIV infections occurred in the United States, representing an eight percent decline in new infections from just four years prior. This decrease was largely due to a significant decline among gay and bisexual men, where new infections dropped 33% in those aged 13 to 24.
Feeling more anxious than usual about sex? You’re not alone
My desire for sex can be squashed by two things: anxiety (of which I have plenty), and laziness. As someone who primarily bottoms, it takes a lot of work and consideration to prepare for sex. More often than not, instead of finding a potential suitor, making plans, douching, cleaning up my apartment and waiting for my hookup to arrive, I’ll grab a toy and take care of myself—it’s easier for me, both mentally and physically.
Gay Sex Ed: Sides — BLOOP
Queer men who don’t like to top or bottom proudly own their sexual identity. BY: BOBBY BOX There have been many times in my life where I’ve considered myself a side. Not to be confused with side piece, or upgrading your fries to onion rings for an extra 99 cents. A side, in the sexual sense, is an individual who doesn’t enjoy giving or receiving anal penetration.
What Is a Side: Meaning & Side Positions
Art by Jaime Hayde There have been many times in my life where I’ve considered myself a side. Not to be confused with side piece, or upgrading your fries to onion rings for an extra 99 cents. A side, in the sexual sense, is an individual who doesn’t enjoy giving or receiving anal penetration. Instead, sides prefer less invasive sexual acts: frottage (dry humping), making out, oral sex, intimate touch and massage, mutual masturbation, and other things of that nature.
Going on a sex vacation made me wonder: am I demisexual?
My vacation was months in the making. After barely surviving my first gay breakup in August 2021, I began planning a trip that would signify my re-entry to the world of singledom. My recent ex was my first serious boyfriend, and I had only been out for a year prior to meeting him. It had taken months of therapy and buckets of tears to admit that I still needed to experience things that I could only do while single; one of which was to broaden my sexual portfolio.
I joined the ‘ball sex revolution’ and turned my scrotum into a dildo
I’m sitting in front of an empty Word document with a bright orange Balldo resting on my lap. What’s a Balldo, you ask? Great question. As its name—a perplexing portmanteau—suggests, the Balldo is a dildo for your balls. I’ll give you a minute to let that settle in. Now, if you’re like me, you probably have a few questions, the first being: “Come again?” And, well, that’s kind of the point.
Gay Sex Ed: Daddies — BLOOP
Theories attempting to explain our community’s penchant for daddies abound, the most prevalent suspects that gay men chase older men due to our collective “daddy issues.” After polling my audience on the subject a few months back, over 80 percent argue that since gay men don’t often have the best relationships with their fathers, they seek this crucial bond when dating. “I wanted gay role models when I was younger, and the closest man to that was my father,” adult actor Jack Dixon tells Grindr.
Unrealistic Ass-pectations: Why Queer Men Are So Insecure About Their Bums
by Bobby Box 5h ago I spend over seven hours on my iPhone every day, which is nearly twice as long as the average American, according to data measurement company Zenith. While I’d like to chalk this up to the fact that I work in digital media, the truth is I probably spend half of that time scrolling through bad takes on Twitter or cruising for hookups on Grindr. As a queer man, much of the content I scroll through is either sexual, self-indulgent, or some combination of the two.
Unrealistic Ass-pectations: Why Queer Men Are So Insecure About Their Bums
I spend over seven hours on my iPhone every day, which is nearly twice as long as the average American, according to data measurement company Zenith. While I’d like to chalk this up to the fact that I work in digital media, the truth is I probably spend half of that time scrolling through bad takes on Twitter or cruising for hookups on Grindr. As a queer man, much of the content I scroll through is either sexual, self-indulgent, or some combination of the two.
What Is Pup Play
Art by Zach Brunner Summer 2020 was coming to a fateful end, so I asked a few friends to join me at the nude beach, a local queer hotspot, for boozy freezies sold by big-breasted and bare-chested women, and for gay cruising nestled within the surrounding foliage. As fate would have it, moments after we arrived, the sunny skies turned dreary and grey.
Total Tops and Bottoms Share Why They Refuse to Be Vers
by Bobby Box 2h ago When it comes to positional preferences, versatility is largely regarded as the most progressive option for queer men. Sticking to the binary of “top” and “bottom” can limit what one does in the bedroom, and queer folks should feel empowered to fuck whoever and however they want. In theory, this thinking tracks, but it doesn’t always hold up in practice.
Total Tops and Bottoms Share Why They Refuse to Be Vers
When it comes to positional preferences, versatility is largely regarded as the most progressive option for queer men. Sticking to the binary of “top” and “bottom” can limit what one does in the bedroom, and queer folks should feel empowered to fuck whoever and however they want. In theory, this thinking tracks, but it doesn’t always hold up in practice.
Let's Talk About Straight People in Queer Spaces
by Bobby Box 6h ago When I moved to Toronto from my hometown of Hamilton, once mortifyingly crowned the city with the most hate crimes in Canada, it was 2018, and I only had one friend. In a desperate attempt to make friends and money, I created a Grindr profile looking for a job as a bartender since I lived one street away from the city’s gay village.
Let's Talk About Straight People in Queer Spaces
When I moved to Toronto from my hometown of Hamilton, once mortifyingly crowned the city with the most hate crimes in Canada, it was 2018, and I only had one friend. In a desperate attempt to make friends and money, I created a Grindr profile looking for a job as a bartender since I lived one street away from the city’s gay village.
Road Bumps: Navigating Anal Sex With Hemorrhoids
by Bobby Box 16h ago Hemorrhoids aren’t the prettiest topic, but they’re a practical one, especially if you enjoy butt sex. According to Mayo Clinic, 75% of people get hemorrhoids “from time to time.” Most of these cases stem from routine habits like straining during bowel movements, sitting too long on the toilet, not eating enough fiber, or engaging in receptive anal sex.
Road Bumps: Navigating Anal Sex With Hemorrhoids
Hemorrhoids aren’t the prettiest topic, but they’re a practical one, especially if you enjoy butt sex. According to Mayo Clinic, 75% of people get hemorrhoids “from time to time.” Most of these cases stem from routine habits like straining during bowel movements, sitting too long on the toilet, not eating enough fiber, or engaging in receptive anal sex.
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