Chandra Pepino

Security can mean different things to different people, especially in a relationship. For many, it’s the security of exclusivity—knowing you’re the only one they’re dating. For others, it’s emotional security—that beautiful feeling of finding a safe space in someone else. It can also be financial security—feeling assured that the future with your partner is going to be a steady, stable one. Here, 10 women share the exact moment they first felt secure in their relationships.

When in a long-term relationship, it’s natural to arrive at a point where you discuss your future together. Do we want to get married? Are we on the same page about starting a family? And in terms of aligning your futures, you will inevitably touch on the topic of money—in particular, for large expenses like your first home, car, or out-of-the-country trip. Patricia Onte, 28, and Donn Tolentino, 25, have been a couple since 2016.

It was March 2, and my dad was preparing for a much-awaited flight to Cebu, after a month of having stayed in my Manila apartment for work errands. He had come from a 12-month contract abroad as a seafarer and was excited to come home, brand-new UTV in tow, and reunite with my big, boisterous family. Then I did the math and realized that my favorite cousin, Jillian, would be celebrating her birthday in a week. So I made the decision to fly home with my dad. I wanted to be there when she turned 11.