Jacqui McCallum

When I turned 40 I expected a few things to change — a few more wrinkles, haywire hormones and a step up in my career as my kids became more self-sufficient. What I didn't expect was how much my mindset would shift. Setting clear boundaries, letting go of one-way relationships and investing in my wellbeing became non-negotiable. Over the past week I've chatted to multiple women who shared how their habits — whether lifestyle, mindset or both — changed after they turned 40.

When my younger son was five, he begged me for yet another toy. I asked how he thought I was going to pay for it and he said, "You just tap that plastic thing and you get money." Cost of living crisis? Solved! My kids are nine and eleven now, and I like to think they’re a bit more money-savvy. But then they go and spend all their birthday cash on Roblox, and I realise, perhaps not. I’m not alone.

Mamamia’s Five Golden Rules series takes a pervy look into the lives of Australian families. From parents of toddlers to parents of teenagers, the series asks parents to share their golden parenting rules, including the rules for their kids, and their rules for just getting through the day. This week, mother-of-two Jacqui shares her Five Golden Rules for parenting pre-teens. My goal is to raise kids that no longer need me.