Jessica Defino
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As seen in:
FLESH WORLD,
Mess World,
The Guardian,
Elemental,
Medium,
MSN,
MSN Ireland,
MSN Singapore,
MSN UK,
The New York Times,
The Startup,
Yahoo Life,
Business Insider
and
Ask Ugly @ The Guardian / writes the FLESH WORLD newsletter
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Articles by Jessica Defino
The Foucault of Eye Patches
Mess World The Foucault of Eye Patches 1× 0:00 Current time: 0:00 / Total time: -1:44:49 -1:44:49 Audio playback is not supported on your browser. Please upgrade. The Foucault of Eye Patches Listen now | Episode 34 of The Mess World Podcast We’re back with a new episode of Mess World, a podcast collaboration between FLESH WORLD (by me, Jessica DeFino) and I <3 Mess (a fashion newsletter from Emily Kirkpatrick).
‘Should I Be Grateful For My Old, Gross Chin?’
A-ing your Qs in 100 words or less. Do you kind of like my Ask Ugly column at the Guardian, but wish my answers were shorter and/or easier to scroll through? Then this one’s for you. Today, I’m addressing 11 of your burning beauty questions in 100 words or less.
The FleshMatrix: Presidential Injectables, Perianal pH, & Handheld Eye Mask Factories
A fun little chart mapping Cosmetics, Health, Desire, & Power. September’s “fresh start effect” has not affected the beauty industry; here, it’s business as usual, but worse. Prominent aesthetics influencer Clavicular was charged with rape. Robots walked the Vogue World runway.
All About That Treble
Current time: 0:00 / Total time: -1:25:08 Audio playback is not supported on your browser. Please upgrade. We’re back with a new episode of Mess World, a podcast collaboration between FLESH WORLD (by me, Jessica DeFino) and I <3 Mess (a fashion newsletter from Emily Kirkpatrick).
The FleshMatrix: Britney’s Botox, Kim’s Broccoli, & A New MAGA Makeup Line
The other week, the algorithm plopped me on the Instagram page of an aesthetic doctor attempting to distance her work (and the work of the beauty industry at large) from looksmaxxing.
The FleshMatrix: Britney’s Botox, Kim’s Broccoli, & A New MAGA Makeup Line
1:20 4 days ago 5 Celebrity Marriages That Ended Surprisingly Quickly Unbranded - unbranded - Entertainment • 4d Not all marriages work out in the end. Here are some of the shortest celebrity marriages of all time. 1, Britney Spears and Jason Alexander. Spears and Alexander got married in Las Vegas. Within a mere 55 hours, the couple announced their separation and the annulment of their union. 2, Mario Lopez and Ali Landry.
Be So Blurreal
This post is too long for email and will cut off in your inbox. Click here for the full version! Hello and welcome to another edition of THE DON’T BUY LIST! Let’s start with a quiz: Who’s on the cover of British Vogue’s September issue? Trick question!! The answer is All Women Are Beautiful <3 (by which I mean One Woman is beautiful and All Women are morphing into One Woman). Anyway.
Queen Victoria, Originator of the Morgue Gaze?
Regular readers know I’ve been on an aesthetic death watch for nearly a year now, tracking the development of what I like to call the “Morgue Gaze” — e.g., necrocosmetics, “casket scents,” coffin-shaped lip gloss, funeral makeup must-haves, the beauty industry’s general glorification of lifelessness, etc.
All Aboard The Glambulance!
Current time: 0:00 / Total time: -1:40:18 Audio playback is not supported on your browser. Please upgrade. We’re back with a new episode of Mess World, a podcast collaboration between FLESH WORLD (by me, Jessica DeFino) and I <3 Mess (a fashion newsletter from Emily Kirkpatrick). Today we’re talking about: The next Lowbrow Book Club read [4:00], Marie Claire Australia’s AI faux pas [9:01], the whole Jessica vs.
Gender Essentialism of the Nose
What’s that smell? Fruity, floral, supposedly “feminine”? Could it be… the stench of far-right politics?
The FleshMatrix: ClitTox, Crones, & A Class Action Juvéderm Lawsuit
For the sake of our humanity, we must stop calling what the beauty industry sells us beauty! (Even Jia Tolentino agrees.) Enter: The FleshMatrix, an attempt at mapping what the word “beauty” meant this month — status signaling? political posturing? hygiene? attractiveness?
Really, Jia?
I’ve been vaguely annoyed with Jia Tolentino for six and a half years, through no fault of her own; it’s just that people credit her with coining the term “Instagram Face” and she didn’t.
You're Gonna Die Someday No Matter How Young You Look
Many months ago, I ordered too many party favors for the FLESH WORLD relaunch + the LA The Hole Debate. My mistake = your merch. The “YOU’RE GONNA DIE SOMEDAY NO MATTER HOW YOUNG YOU LOOK”Bumper Sticker, $7 — a nod to my newsletter sign-off. The “YOU LOOK BAD”mirror cling, $7 — an answer (antidote?) to Glossier’s beloved You Look Good mirror decals. The “GET OFF MY HOLE!” Bumper Sticker, $7 — a message to the burgeoning butthole beauty category (and your fellow drivers).
Diabolical Lines
Two young, successful, blonde-adjacent women dissecting “The Botox Psyop” and neuromodulators’ negligible effect on pretty privilege?? When the near-blondes in question are caro claire burke and Katie Gatti Tassin of Diabolical Lies, I’m in! Their latest podcast episode is a must-listen: I spoke to Caro for this episode and my work is cited throughout, so I figured I’d round up some of my past writing on diabolical lines — AKA wrinkles — for anyone interested in more anti-anti-aging reading.
Nietzsche's Favorite Lip Gloss
This post is too long for email and will cut off in your inbox. Click here for the full version! Hello and welcome to another edition of THE DON’T BUY LIST! I stepped into my general practitioner’s office to renew my Prozac prescription last week and was greeted by a Shaq-sized promo for a chemical peel promising to “soften fine lines and wrinkles.” I fear the Prozac is not enough.
I’m getting married again. How do I avoid the pressure to look perfect this time around?
My 91-year-old grandmother had her 1954 wedding album out on her lap when I visited the other day. "I wanted to remember how beautiful I used to be," she sighed. Every time my mom comes across a photo of her own 1984 nuptials, she says the same thing: "Look at how skinny I was!" (Or, sometimes, "Can you believe Daddy wore a white tuxedo with tails?" Which I cannot.) I share the impulse.
Clear Eyes, Pink Nips, Can't Lose
Current time: 0:00 / Total time: -1:39:40 Audio playback is not supported on your browser. Please upgrade. We’re back with a new episode of Mess World, a podcast collaboration between FLESH WORLD (by me, Jessica DeFino) and I <3 Mess (a fashion newsletter from Emily Kirkpatrick).
The FleshMatrix: Bimbo Stoicism, Labial Collagen, & Clavicular's Descent
Calling the cosmetics industry the “beauty” industry is a bit like calling the 2A movement the “freedom” movement. That’s just not what that is. Enter: The FleshMatrix, an attempt at mapping what the word “beauty” meant this month — status signaling? political posturing? hygiene? attractiveness? — via a fun little perceptual map plotted across four quadrants: Where does “bimbo stoicism” fall? What about Clavicular’s nose job?
Everything Is Perfume Commercial
Do you kind of like my Ask Ugly column at the Guardian, but wish my answers were shorter and/or easier to scroll through? Then this one’s for you. Today, I’m addressing 12 of your burning beauty questions in 100 words or less.
In Defense of Dead Skin Cells
Admit it: Ever since the first grainy glob of St. Ives Apricot Scrub touched down on your pre-pubescent cheek, you’ve devoted your life to destroying your dead skin cells. And why wouldn’t you? Dead skin is the culprit behind all skincare concerns: dullness, dryness, flakiness, clogged pores, pimples…Right? Photo by Raspopova Marina on Unsplash Well, not to cause your well-exfoliated head to explode or anything, but everything you think you know about dead skin cells is wrong.
Pulverized Cow Cartilage Popsicles For Plumper Skin ūüėč
Hello and welcome to another edition of THE DON‚ÄôT BUY LIST! There‚Äôs been much debate about whether ‚Äúnaked‚ÄĚ nails are the new status symbol lately ‚ÄĒ¬†a signifier of wealth, class, taste, etc. But fingernails-as-financial-bracket-indictor is a tale (at least) as old as Tolstoy.
Plastic Surgery Poesy
Current time: 0:00 / Total time: -2:20:18 Audio playback is not supported on your browser. Please upgrade. We’re back with a new episode of Mess World, a podcast collaboration between FLESH WORLD (by me, Jessica DeFino) and I <3 Mess (a fashion newsletter from Emily Kirkpatrick).
The FleshMatrix: AK-47 Lip Balm, 1% Vaginas, & Money Shot Makeup
If language molds minds and shapes beliefs — and it does — then maybe the reason we’re so screwed up about our skin and faces and bodies is because we call the stifling ideal they’re measured against beauty. Enter: The FleshMatrix, an attempt at mapping what the word “beauty” meant this month — status signaling? political posturing? cosmetic coping?
Should I let my nine-year-old daughter wax her moustache?
My nine-year-old daughter has become aware that she has a moustache. (I’m a hairy Italian, this is her birthright.) It’s more noticeable than anything her friends have, and visible in pictures. When she first mentioned it last year, my instinct was to deny its existence, but I realized I’d be lying. So I said, “That’s OK, I have it too. Lots of girls do.” She brought it up again recently, in a more pointed and negative way. Do I tell her that we can do something about it if it bothers her?
God Is Watching You (Wash Your Face)
An interview with "Someday Perfect" author Kat Schneider about the male gaze and the divine gaze. When I heard YA author Kat Schneider describe her newly-released graphic novel, Someday Perfect — a coming-of-age romance set at a strict Christian sleepaway camp — as an exploration of “being a teenage girl, living under both the male gaze and the gaze of a higher being,” I knew I had to read it. (To be fair, I was going to read it anyway.
Dekonstructing the Kardashians with MJ Corey
I used to be a Kardashian sister. I used to be all of them, actually. In the summer of 2015, newly-hired as an editor for the short-lived Kardashian Jenner Official Apps, I assumed the identities of Kourtney, Kim, Khloé, Kendall, and Kylie. I created their content, parroted their speech patterns, textualized their valley-speak vocal fry. I learned how to contour, bought a Kylie Lip Kit — no freebies for fake sisters! — and dissolved into a simulation of the the Calabasas-bred billionaires.
MJ Corey Will Make You Love the Kardashians
All photos courtesy of Jessica DeFino I used to be a Kardashian sister. In fact, I used to be all five of them. In the summer of 2015, I assumed the identities of Kourtney, Kim, Khloé, Kendall, and Kylie as the newly-hired editor of the family’s short-lived official apps. I created their content, parroted their speech patterns, and textualized their valley-speak vocal fry.
¿Cómo responder a mis amigas cuando critican su propio peso y aspecto?
¿Cómo respondo a mis amigas cuando critican su cuerpo, su rostro o su piel? Confusa con las conversaciones Una amiga se queja a menudo de su peso. Me parece que sería paternalista decirle que está contribuyendo al negocio de la industria de la belleza y reforzando un statu quo que mantiene a las mujeres obsesionadas con su aspecto físico. Pero decirle “¡eres guapa!” me parece superficial. Otra amiga me dijo que necesita ponerse más bótox pronto porque odia sus arrugas de la frente.
The Cult of Cuteness
Current time: 0:00 / Total time: -1:47:41 Audio playback is not supported on your browser. Please upgrade. We’re back with a new episode of Mess World, a podcast collaboration between FLESH WORLD (by me, Jessica DeFino) and I <3 Mess (a fashion newsletter from Emily Kirkpatrick).
The FleshMatrix: MAGA Smells, Red Light Masks, & Love-Rage Blush
If beauty consists of “rituals of control,” if beauty is “necessary” to get ahead in the workplace, if beauty means “risking [your] health for a fling with fame”… then why do we keep calling it beauty? Enter: The FleshMatrix, an attempt at mapping what the word “beauty” meant this month — class performance? political action? consumerism? attractiveness? a bit of everything?
How do I respond to my friends when they criticize their own weight and looks?
How do I respond to my friends when they criticize their bodies, faces, skin? One friend frequently complains about her weight. It would feel preachy to tell her that she’s supporting the beauty industrial complex and reinforcing a status quo that keeps women fixated on their physical appearance. But saying, “You’re beautiful!” feels shallow. Another friend told me she needs to get more Botox soon because she hates the lines in her forehead.
Like We're Gonna Die Hot
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The Butt Blush Boom
Current time: 0:00 / Total time: -1:40:03 Audio playback is not supported on your browser. Please upgrade. We’re back with a new episode of Mess World, a podcast collaboration between FLESH WORLD (by me, Jessica DeFino) and I <3 Mess (a fashion newsletter from Emily Kirkpatrick).
Is Employment Making You Ugly?
Hello and welcome to another edition of THE DON’T BUY LIST! Earlier this month, I exited the worst sauna experience of my life — a German Aufguss ceremony inexplicably set to heavy metal music, in which blistering heat and boiling water (accidentally splashed on me by an overly enthusiastic Aufgussmeister) left my skin red, raw, and stinging for days — only to run into a couple of New York Times reporters covering the event.
The FleshMatrix: Kennedy Cosplay, Lunch Break Boob Jobs, & Sexy Acne Serum
Philosophers have debated the definition of beauty for centuries; after a decade in the beauty industry, I can confidently answer: Not this! Enter: The FleshMatrix, an attempt at mapping what the word “beauty” mystified this month — class performance? political allegiance? consumerism? hygiene? a bit of everything?
Would you use cadaver fat for a boob job or butt lift? Some people already do
I recently became aware of new cosmetic injectables derived from cadaver fat – as in, made of dead people. Apparently the fat is harvested from organ and tissue donors and used for procedures like Brazilian butt lifts and boob jobs. What is this? How is it legal? Even if it is legal, how is it ethical? – The Beauty Industry Is Killing Me “Calling them donors is crass,” a plastic surgeon says.
Would you use cadaver fat for a boob job or butt lift? Some people already do
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A Plethora of Subhuman Aesthetics
Hello and welcome to another edition of THE DON’T BUY LIST! Between Bryan Johnson’s appearance at Paris Fashion Week, Clavicular’s unironic Patrick Bateman cosplay commercial, the Women’s History Month pitch I received touting the inherent feminism of the topical lip filler pen, and the fact that looksmaxxing language has infiltrated the U.S. Department of War, I’m about ready to pack it up and quit.
Planned Parenthood Offers Botox Now. The Makers Of Botox Donated Over $135,000 To Politicians Who Defunded It
On March 3rd, Planned Parenthood announced it would start offering Botox at its Mar Monte affiliate, the largest in the nation, serving areas in California and Nevada. By rolling out cosmetic services — with filler and laser hair removal potentially coming soon, according to representatives — the famed healthcare organization aims to close a $100 million budget gap created by President Trump’s One Big Beautiful Bill Act, which defunded Planned Parenthood when it was signed into law in July 2025.
Current time: 0:00 / Total time: -2:00:14 Audio playback is not supported on your browser. Please upgrade. We’re back with a new episode of Mess World, a podcast collaboration between FLESH WORLD (by me, Jessica DeFino) and I <3 Mess (a fashion newsletter from Emily Kirkpatrick).
The FleshMatrix: Manosphere Models, Erewhon Botox, & Hot Girls <3 Chinese Medicine
A fun little chart mapping Cosmetics, Health, Desire, & Power. The beauty industry doesn’t sell beauty; it sells cosmetics. Cosmetics are semiotic tools; they can communicate wealth, health, gender, power, political allegiance, attractiveness, etc.
I can’t stop picking at my pimples. How do I break this habit?
‘For the time being, consider covering your spots with pimple patches or Band-Aids before you pick.’ Illustration: Lola Beltran/The Guardian I tend to get pimples, especially around my period. This is fine and normal. What’s not fine is that I cannot stop picking at them, making my skin irritated and red.
Tyra Banks & Her Flawsome Five-Head
Watch the “ANTM” documentary with me tonight at 6pm ET! Tyra Banks has a five-head. It’s a flaw, but it’s fine. Better than fine, even. It’s what makes Banks — supermodel, creator of America’s Next Top Model, and subject of the new Netflix documentary, Reality Check: Inside America’s Next Top Model — “flawsome.” Along with “smizing” and “tooching,” Banks coined the term “flawsome” on the set of ANTM, the model-molding reality show that aired from 2003 to 2018.
Beauty x The Epstein Files
This post is too long for email and will cut off in your inbox. Click here for the full version! Hello and welcome to another edition of THE DON’T BUY LIST! I’ve been MIA here but plugging away over at the Lowbrow Book Club, the fashion- and beauty-focused book club I run with Emily Kirkpatrick (“deep thoughts about superficial things”).
Longevity Erotica
Current time: 0:00 / Total time: -1:59:39 Audio playback is not supported on your browser. Please upgrade. We’re back with a new episode of Mess World, a podcast collaboration between FLESH WORLD (by me, Jessica DeFino) and I <3 Mess (a fashion newsletter from Emily Kirkpatrick).
Introducing: The FleshMatrix!
A theory: Appearance, cosmetics, attractiveness, health, hygiene, wellbeing, wealth, power, class, and status are separate (sometimes overlapping) things. The beauty industry refers to them as the same thing: beauty. None of these are actually beauty. (The force that fuels the human spirit? The stuff of sunsets and sunflowers and paintings and poetry? An “occasion for un-selfing”? The Beauty as in: Beauty, Freedom, Truth, Love??
Can you become ugly if you have ugly thoughts?
Illustration: Lola Beltran/The Guardian (Illustration: Lola Beltran/The Guardian) Hey Ugly, They say we end up with the face we deserve. When we think “ugly” (hurtful, spiteful, non-constructive) thoughts, our faces tense and harden. Similarly, when I ignore my needs, my face shows me signs of it.
THUTT!
Hello and welcome to another edition of THE DON’T BUY LIST! Friction is the word on everyone’s lips lately. We’re friction-maxxing. There’s the friction advantage. Less convenience (more friction) = more happiness. But what about friction of the face? Friction for the eyes?? Beauty standards reflect culture, and I’ve long said that the pull of frictionless lives inspired the push toward frictionless skin: Glazed donut skin. Dewy dumpling skin.
The Rick Owens Toothbrush Fell Apart In My Mouth
If spending $87 on something meant to be shoved into a morning-breathed mouth-hole is objectively stupid, then I am an idiot. (You may have already sensed this.) I bought the Rick Owens x Selahatin Toothbrush.
ICE Barbie
Hello and welcome to another edition of THE DON’T BUY LIST! I was nine pages into Tarpley Hitt’s Barbieland when a push notification lit up my phone screen. In Minneapolis, ICE agent Jonathan Ross had murdered Renee Good, a 37-year-old poet, mother, and US citizen. I put down the book. Turned on the TV.
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