“Madam, you have between your legs an instrument capable of giving pleasure to thousands, and all you can do is scratch it,” the English conductor Sir Thomas Beecham is said to have told a cellist during a rehearsal. The quip is still played for laughs, dredged up by the likes of Classic FM (“The best conductor insults”) and, apparently, Sir Georg Solti, who repeated it during a Chicago Symphony Orchestra rehearsal in 1995.