Leslie Becker Phelps

All too often in a relationship one partner’s good intentions somehow transform into an argument. Understanding this dynamic is essential in changing it. I do a lot of couples therapy and have found that one common – and particularly upsetting – dynamic is when one partner expects kudos for their attempt to be helpful and both partners end up with feelings of rejection and frustration. If you have been there, you know exactly what I’m talking about.

The word is finally getting out there in the self-help world about attachment theory, which is wonderful because it can be so helpful in understanding your personal struggles and how you nurture more positive relationships with yourself and others. So, to help you use attachment theory to improve the quality of your life, this article offers a brief, user-friendly explanation of it.

WebMD Blog: Relationships Think Twice Before You Give Advice Wednesday, August 18, 2021 By Leslie Becker-Phelps, PhD Photo: Wikimedia Commons If only we were as good at solving our own problems as we are at solving other people’s. But like so many great ideas, our solutions for others often become less perfect the more we learn about the problem. So it is important to listen more as others share, tempering the impulse to give advice. Everyone’s lives are complicated.