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Mother scholar. The phrase rolls off the tongue with the force and ferocity of a curse word—blunt, unsparing, weighty. I didn’t coin the term, but I inhabit it. A vessel for the seeming contradictions of tenderness and skepticism, integration and dissection. Of being simultaneously maternal and cerebral in institutions that reward detachment, autonomy, and efficiency.
Subscribe to The Podcast by KevinMD. Watch on YouTube. Catch up on old episodes! Psychotherapist and author Margo Lowy discusses her article, “Maternal ambivalence: the side of motherhood no one talks about.” She explores the often unspoken emotional complexities of motherhood, where love and frustration coexist.
It’s 1:30 p.m. on a Tuesday, and I’m sitting comfortably, propped up by four pillows with my feet on a medicine ball in front of the sofa. I laugh with complete delight as I stare at my belly and see the spunky kicks of my daughter, dancing inside my womb to the beat of her own music. The joy I feel is indescribable. But then, I look around. A UWorld 40-question block is pulled up next to me, with a Step-Up to Medicine book behind it.
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