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Articles by Tom Scocca
The Stairs, Chapter 39
THE STAIRS © Tom Scocca, 2025 This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual people, places, and events is entirely coincidental, with the exception of the events in Chapters One and Two, which happened more or less as written, on the line between Cambridge and Somerville, Massachusetts, on Memorial Day weekend in 1999. 39. I woke up to bright sunlight and a thumping sound. Theo and Maxine were squinting and crawling out of their sleeping bags. The sound was coming from the door to the stairs.
The Stairs, Chapter 38
THE STAIRS © Tom Scocca, 2025 This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual people, places, and events is entirely coincidental, with the exception of the events in Chapters One and Two, which happened more or less as written, on the line between Cambridge and Somerville, Massachusetts, on Memorial Day weekend in 1999. 38. Out on the landing behind us was a tall, stooped figure in a blue windbreaker. In his hand was a wide box made of stiff paper, tied up with string.
The Stairs, Chapter 37
THE STAIRS © Tom Scocca, 2025 This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual people, places, and events is entirely coincidental, with the exception of the events in Chapters One and Two, which happened more or less as written, on the line between Cambridge and Somerville, Massachusetts, on Memorial Day weekend in 1999. 37. "That wasn't helpful," Maxine said.
The Stairs, Chapter 36
THE STAIRS © Tom Scocca, 2025 This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual people, places, and events is entirely coincidental, with the exception of the events in Chapters One and Two, which happened more or less as written, on the line between Cambridge and Somerville, Massachusetts, on Memorial Day weekend in 1999. 36. "Waste of perfectly good sabotage, if you ask me," Pythia said.
The Stairs, Chapter 35
THE STAIRS © Tom Scocca, 2025 This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual people, places, and events is entirely coincidental, with the exception of the events in Chapters One and Two, which happened more or less as written, on the line between Cambridge and Somerville, Massachusetts, on Memorial Day weekend in 1999. 35. Our own frozen moment was abruptly broken by the sound of Maxine yelling.
The Stairs, Chapter 34
THE STAIRS © Tom Scocca, 2025 This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual people, places, and events is entirely coincidental, with the exception of the events in Chapters One and Two, which happened more or less as written, on the line between Cambridge and Somerville, Massachusetts, on Memorial Day weekend in 1999. 34. A minute or so later, the lights of little Old Marble came back on.
The Stairs, Chapter 33
THE STAIRS © Tom Scocca, 2025 This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual people, places, and events is entirely coincidental, with the exception of the events in Chapters One and Two, which happened more or less as written, on the line between Cambridge and Somerville, Massachusetts, on Memorial Day weekend in 1999. 33. Dr. Argemend and Norman Melk had folded down the cage while we were away and had wrapped it into a smaller canvas bundle.
The Stairs, Chapter 32
THE STAIRS © Tom Scocca, 2025 This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual people, places, and events is entirely coincidental, with the exception of the events in Chapters One and Two, which happened more or less as written, on the line between Cambridge and Somerville, Massachusetts, on Memorial Day weekend in 1999. 32. We turned around. "Professor Melk!" I said. Norman Melk, standing by the empty cage with a scarf wrapped up to his chin, looked blank. "'Professor'?
The Stairs, Chapter 31
THE STAIRS © Tom Scocca, 2025 This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual people, places, and events is entirely coincidental, with the exception of the events in Chapters One and Two, which happened more or less as written, on the line between Cambridge and Somerville, Massachusetts, on Memorial Day weekend in 1999. 31. At first I thought I was looking at a huge model landscape of mountains and valleys.
The Stairs, Chapter 30
THE STAIRS © Tom Scocca, 2025 This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual people, places, and events is entirely coincidental, with the exception of the events in Chapters One and Two, which happened more or less as written, on the line between Cambridge and Somerville, Massachusetts, on Memorial Day weekend in 1999 30. We weren't the only ones heading for the Electro-Parade. As we walked, the sidewalk around filled with more and more people.
The Stairs, Chapter 29
THE STAIRS © Tom Scocca, 2025 This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual people, places, and events is entirely coincidental, with the exception of the events in Chapters One and Two, which happened more or less as written, on the line between Cambridge and Somerville, Massachusetts, on Memorial Day weekend in 1999. 29. Five minutes later, we were on the No. 71 bus. According to Maxine, it was a Yellow Coach 700 Series, rear engine.
The Stairs, Chapter 28
THE STAIRS © Tom Scocca, 2025 This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual people, places, and events is entirely coincidental, with the exception of the events in Chapters One and Two, which happened more or less as written, on the line between Cambridge and Somerville, Massachusetts, on Memorial Day weekend in 1999. 28. Maxine and I must have had our shock wear off at the same instant. At least, we had reached the door simultaneously and were pounding at it in unison. "Wait!" I yelled.
The Stairs, Chapter 27
THE STAIRS © Tom Scocca, 2025 This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual people, places, and events is entirely coincidental, with the exception of the events in Chapters One and Two, which happened more or less as written, on the line between Cambridge and Somerville, Massachusetts, on Memorial Day weekend in 1999. 27. Warren Hartstock made the smallest possible gesture toward a pair of wooden chairs.
The Stairs, Chapter 26
THE STAIRS © Tom Scocca, 2025 This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual people, places, and events is entirely coincidental, with the exception of the events in Chapters One and Two, which happened more or less as written, on the line between Cambridge and Somerville, Massachusetts, on Memorial Day weekend in 1999. 26. We'd made some plans. I wasn't sure I liked the plans, but I couldn't think of what else to do.
The Stairs, Chapter 25
THE STAIRS © Tom Scocca, 2025 This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual people, places, and events is entirely coincidental, with the exception of the events in Chapters One and Two, which happened more or less as written, on the line between Cambridge and Somerville, Massachusetts, on Memorial Day weekend in 1999. 25. Dinner was pizza again. That was fine with Theo and Maxine and me, although I couldn't help wondering how many days we'd be able to repeat it.
The Stairs, Chapter 24
THE STAIRS © Tom Scocca, 2025 This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual people, places, and events is entirely coincidental, with the exception of the events in Chapters One and Two, which happened more or less as written, on the line between Cambridge and Somerville, Massachusetts, on Memorial Day weekend in 1999. 24. Getting Emily to take us to the Municipal Stables was as easy as it had been to get her to take us to Fort Muntjac.
The Stairs, Chapter 23
THE STAIRS © Tom Scocca, 2025 This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual people, places, and events is entirely coincidental, with the exception of the events in Chapters One and Two, which happened more or less as written, on the line between Cambridge and Somerville, Massachusetts, on Memorial Day weekend in 1999. 23. After the sunlight, it was so dim inside I couldn't see anything but blackish green, or greenish black.
The Stairs, Chapter 22
THE STAIRS © Tom Scocca, 2025 This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual people, places, and events is entirely coincidental, with the exception of the events in Chapters One and Two, which happened more or less as written, on the line between Cambridge and Somerville, Massachusetts, on Memorial Day weekend in 1999. 22. "So here we are again," Maxine said. She was sitting on her rolled-up sleeping bag, which she'd just dropped on the floor along with her backpack.
The Stairs, Chapter 21
THE STAIRS © Tom Scocca, 2025 This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual people, places, and events is entirely coincidental, with the exception of the events in Chapters One and Two, which happened more or less as written, on the line between Cambridge and Somerville, Massachusetts, on Memorial Day weekend in 1999. 21. "I'm going to have to go to the office today," Mom told us. "Emily said she can come over and watch you.
The Stairs, Chapter 20
THE STAIRS © Tom Scocca, 2025 This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual people, places, and events is entirely coincidental, with the exception of the events in Chapters One and Two, which happened more or less as written, on the line between Cambridge and Somerville, Massachusetts, on Memorial Day weekend in 1999. "What should we do?" Theo whispered, his bossiness instantly gone. The tapping at the door paused, then began again, a little louder. I sat there listening to it.
The Stairs, Chapter 19
THE STAIRS © Tom Scocca, 2025 This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual people, places, and events is entirely coincidental, with the exception of the events in Chapters One and Two, which happened more or less as written, on the line between Cambridge and Somerville, Massachusetts, on Memorial Day weekend in 1999. 19. "Are you ready for things to return to normal?" Mom asked. Theo and I flinched a little. "What do you mean?" Theo said. "The furniture?" Mom said. "Your father?
The Stairs, Chapter 18
THE STAIRS © Tom Scocca, 2025 This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual people, places, and events is entirely coincidental, with the exception of the events in Chapters One and Two, which happened more or less as written, on the line between Cambridge and Somerville, Massachusetts, on Memorial Day weekend in 1999. "My Dear Young Friends," the letter began. "I hope this letter finds you." We were reading it up in our bedroom, sitting on the bare floor.
The Stairs, Chapter 17
THE STAIRS © Tom Scocca, 2025 This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual people, places, and events is entirely coincidental, with the exception of the events in Chapters One and Two, which happened more or less as written, on the line between Cambridge and Somerville, Massachusetts, on Memorial Day weekend in 1999. "What was that about?" I said. The room felt even more hushed than it had been before. Maxine turned to the nearest bookshelf. "I think he wanted us to read the book," she said.
The Stairs, Chapter 16
THE STAIRS © Tom Scocca, 2025 This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual people, places, and events is entirely coincidental, with the exception of the events in Chapters One and Two, which happened more or less as written, on the line between Cambridge and Somerville, Massachusetts, on Memorial Day weekend in 1999. Maxine let the phone droop halfway away from her mouth and stared toward the sound. "Hello...?" she said. "Hello?" the voice said again.
The Stairs, Chapter 15
THE STAIRS © Tom Scocca, 2025 This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual people, places, and events is entirely coincidental, with the exception of the events in Chapters One and Two, which happened more or less as written, on the line between Cambridge and Somerville, Massachusetts, on Memorial Day weekend in 1999. Going home, we changed trains so we could get off at the Marble College stop.
"A Biography of a Mountain: The Making and Meaning of Mount Rushmore," Reviewed
A Biography of a Mountain: The Making and Meaning of Mount Rushmore by Matthew Davis “When people first see Mount Rushmore, most are shocked by its size, though not in the way they expect,” Matthew Davis writes in A Biography of a Mountain: The Making and Meaning of Mount Rushmore. “Most find it smaller than their minds had conceived.” I experienced the same disorientation when I first encountered the monument.
The Stairs, Chapter 14
THE STAIRS © Tom Scocca, 2025 This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual people, places, and events is entirely coincidental, with the exception of the events in Chapters One and Two, which happened more or less as written, on the line between Cambridge and Somerville, Massachusetts, on Memorial Day weekend in 1999. "Salmon salad, on rye," Maxine said. "And iced tea, please." "Salmon salad, on white," Theo said. "And a root beer.
The Clown Joke
HUMOR DEP'T. There's this guy, he's the most famous clown in the world, called the Great Pagliacci, right? So: the Great Pagliacci goes to the doctor one day. He's on the road, he just picks one out of the phone book, by some miracle the doctor has an appointment. Somebody canceled. So the Great Pagliacci goes to the doctor's office. What can I do for you? the doctor says. Doctor, the Great Pagliacci says, I'm feeling awful. There is no joy in my life. Everything just seems pointless and miserable.
The Stairs, Chapter 13
THE STAIRS © Tom Scocca, 2025 This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual people, places, and events is entirely coincidental, with the exception of the events in Chapters One and Two, which happened more or less as written, on the line between Cambridge and Somerville, Massachusetts, on Memorial Day weekend in 1999. 13. The greenhouse door opened and there, blinking into the night, was a woman about as old as Mom, wearing a white lab coat. "It's past visiting hours, I'm afraid," she said.
The Stairs, Chapter 12
THE STAIRS © Tom Scocca, 2025 This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual people, places, and events is entirely coincidental, with the exception of the events in Chapters One and Two, which happened more or less as written, on the line between Cambridge and Somerville, Massachusetts, on Memorial Day weekend in 1999. 12. Once again, we were freezing.
The Stairs, Chapter 11
THE STAIRS © Tom Scocca, 2025 This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual people, places, and events is entirely coincidental, with the exception of the events in Chapters One and Two, which happened more or less as written, on the line between Cambridge and Somerville, Massachusetts, on Memorial Day weekend in 1999. "But we already came here on the subway," Theo complained.
The Stairs, Chapter 10
THE STAIRS © Tom Scocca, 2025 This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual people, places, and events is entirely coincidental, with the exception of the events in Chapters One and Two, which happened more or less as written, on the line between Cambridge and Somerville, Massachusetts, on Memorial Day weekend in 1999. Shinter's was so big it had its own separate entrance in the subway.
The Stairs, Chapter Nine
THE STAIRS © Tom Scocca, 2025 This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual people, places, and events is entirely coincidental, with the exception of the events in Chapters One and Two, which happened more or less as written, on the line between Cambridge and Somerville, Massachusetts, on Memorial Day weekend in 1999. “There isn't any subway stop on 75th Street,” I said.
THE STAIRS © Tom Scocca, 2025 This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual people, places, and events is entirely coincidental, with the exception of the events in Chapters One and Two, which happened more or less as written, on the line between Cambridge and Somerville, Massachusetts, on Memorial Day weekend in 1999. It took a while after the squirrel had spoken for me to be able say anything back. "Excuse me?" I managed.
The Stairs, Chapter Seven
THE STAIRS © Tom Scocca, 2025 This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual people, places, and events is entirely coincidental, with the exception of the events in Chapters One and Two, which happened more or less as written, on the line between Cambridge and Somerville, Massachusetts, on Memorial Day weekend in 1999. "That was good pie," Theo said.
The Stairs, Chapter Six
THE STAIRS © Tom Scocca, 2025 This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual people, places, and events is entirely coincidental, with the exception of the events in Chapters One and Two, which happened more or less as written, on the line between Cambridge and Somerville, Massachusetts, on Memorial Day weekend in 1999. "What are—" I repeated, goggling at the furious face behind the diner counter.
The Stairs, Chapter Five
THE STAIRS © Tom Scocca, 2025 This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual people, places, and events is entirely coincidental, with the exception of the events in Chapters One and Two, which happened more or less as written, on the line between Cambridge and Somerville, Massachusetts, on Memorial Day weekend in 1999. It was snowing, all right. A good inch or so was covering everything, and flakes were blowing through the streetlamps.
The Stairs, Chapter Four
THE STAIRS © Tom Scocca, 2025 This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual people, places, and events is entirely coincidental, with the exception of the events in Chapters One and Two, which happened more or less as written, on the line between Cambridge and Somerville, Massachusetts, on Memorial Day weekend in 1999. "What's this about?" said Maxine, as soon as we were in the bedroom. I must have looked confused. How did she know it was about anything? "Guys," she said, rolling her eyes.
MR WRONG: GABA Gabba Hey
BUT FIRST, BEFORE WE BEGIN DEP'T. THE STAIRS - INDIGNITY This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual people, places, and events is entirely coincidental, with the exception of the events in Chapters One and Two, which happened more or less as written, on the line between Cambridge and Somerville, Massachusetts, on Memorial Day weekend in 1999. Before the next chapter drops on Friday, get caught up on THE STAIRS, Tom Scocca's serialized work of fiction! COLUMN DEP’T.
Indignity Image Roundup: SUNSET
BUT FIRST, BEFORE WE BEGIN DEP'T. THE STAIRS - INDIGNITY This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual people, places, and events is entirely coincidental, with the exception of the events in Chapters One and Two, which happened more or less as written, on the line between Cambridge and Somerville, Massachusetts, on Memorial Day weekend in 1999. Get caught up on THE STAIRS, Tom Scocca's serialized work of fiction! BUSINESS DEP'T.
The Stairs, Chapter Three
THE STAIRS © Tom Scocca, 2025 This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual people, places, and events is entirely coincidental, with the exception of the events in Chapters One and Two, which happened more or less as written, on the line between Cambridge and Somerville, Massachusetts, on Memorial Day weekend in 1999. "I'm going to have to go to the office today," Mom told us. "Emily said she can come over and watch you.
THE STAIRS © Tom Scocca, 2025 This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual people, places, and events is entirely coincidental, with the exception of the events in Chapters One and Two, which happened more or less as written, on the line between Cambridge and Somerville, Massachusetts, on Memorial Day weekend in 1999. Before I keep going, I just want to say this right now.
The Stairs, Chapter One
HAPPY FRIDAY! THIS is your editor emeritus, Tom. I am now fully ensconced in my new full-time journalistic job, under the terms of which, as previously discussed, I am barred from publishing nonfiction in outlets other than the one that employs me. Therefore, as also previously discussed, Indignity will be bringing you a serialized work of fiction by me. It is a novel for young readers, titled The Stairs. There should be about 45 more chapters following this one, depending on editing decisions.
MR WRONG: “I’m in control here”
COLUMN DEP’T. MR WRONG: This Is Your Captain Speaking GOOD MORNING! THIS is the latest iteration of the MR WRONG column, but also, this is Joe MacLeod, and I am the new editor of INDIGNITY. Wha? How did this happen? Is it April 1st? No! As we learned yesterday during Indignity Vol. 5, No. 195, the now-former editor of INDIGNITY got a Day Job, and one of the requirements was no more writing all that good stuff for INDIGNITY! And no more INDIGNITY Morning Podcast! Over! Newsletter news Indignity Vol.
Newsletter news
BUSINESS DEP'T. A New Form of Indignity HELLO, READERS OF Indignity! This is Tom, your editor in chief. Starting tomorrow, I'm going to be leaving my daily writing for Indignity to work full-time as an executive editor at CNN's features department. As many of you know, the publication you're reading has been through multiple formats, platforms, revenue models, and names since Joe and I launched the website Hmm Daily in 2019.
Indignity Morning Podcast No. 570: It's always been a pleasure.
PODCAST — 2 min read Indignity Morning Podcast No. 570: It’s always been a pleasure. AI-GENERATED SUMMARY: The conversation highlights ZOHRAN Mamdani’s significant electoral victory in New York City, emphasizing the overwhelming support he received from voters, particularly in the context of threats from Donald Trump. Mamdani’s victory speech underscores the city’s identity as a hub for immigrants and a collective resilience against external pressures.
Indignity Morning Podcast No. 569: Dick Cheney is dead.
PODCAST — 3 min read Indignity Morning Podcast No. 569: Dick Cheney is dead. AI-GENERATED SUMMARY: There are many ways to experience the Indignity Morning Podcast! Here is the "Simple Sharing Page:" INDIGNITY MORNING PODCAST Episode 569: Indignity Morning Podcast No. 569: Dick Cheney is dead. AI-GENERATED SUMMARY: If you are reading this in your EMAIL, click the box below. It should take you to the WEBSITE version of this post and the audio file of today's podcast.
Politics is local
PUBLIC WORKS DEP'T. Maybe New Yorkers Want a Mayor Who Likes New York TODAY, THE PRESIDENT of the United States, a resident of Florida, endorsed Andrew Cuomo for the mayorship of New York City. So did the wealthiest person in the world, a resident of Texas. Many people have expressed strong opinions about who should be the mayor of a city in which they don't live, sometimes about what the fares should be on the buses they don't ride.
Indignity Morning Podcast No. 568: The sepia tone of afterthoughts.
Indignity Morning Podcast No. 568: The sepia tone of afterthoughts. AI-GENERATED SUMMARY: This conversation delves into the complexities surrounding the War Powers Act, particularly in the context of air wars and presidential authority. It examines the historical background of the legislation, its implications for unauthorized military actions, and the influence of public perception and media on the narrative of military engagements.
Indignity Image Roundup: MONSTER
TRICK OR TREAT! The month of October has arrived at its end at the conclusion of a workweek, which means that everyone can go out and have their costumed fun and transgression on a single day and night, as the Old Gods intended. Tomorrow the calendar turns to a new month, and the pumpkins will be strictly for pumpkin pies—but not until after we have brought you the October installment of Indignity's GETTY IMAGES ROUNDUP.
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