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Andy Sowar on Muck Rack

Andy Sowar

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Articles

Being Santa Would Be Endless Torture

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By Jordan Breeding Verified, Will Grier, Andy Sowar
| Cracked Verified
The Santa Clause is the heartwarming family tale of Tim Allen murdering Santa Claus which seems like a pretty good deal until you do some math and realize that single night of delivering presents lasts thousands of years thanks to Santa's magical time-stopping powers. Which makes us wonder, did Tim Allen actually kill Santa, or did Santa fake his death to escape from the endless torture of being Big Man Christmas?
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