‘Occasionally the fog of ignorance and insecurity parts for just a moment to provide a glimpse of what it might be like to be an experienced doctor.’ Photograph: Phanie/Alamy For the last four years I’ve been breaking every rule of appropriate, normal behaviour. I’ve poked, probed, inserted, stabbed and cut people in their most intimate body parts. I’ve examined dissected bodies and riffled through a bucket of human hearts.