Holt Smith

Opinion Nov 23, 2025, 11:23 PM Editor's note: Though this piece is labeled "satire," all included quotes are real. Dear Reader. Over the last weekend, eight moderate Senate Democrats cut a deal to end the federal government shutdown. What the Republicans get is this: everything they want. What the Democrats get is this: a vote in the Senate without a commitment that it will pass. My political illiteracy aside, getting everything one wants sounds pretty good. What about what the Democrats get?

Opinion Oct 27, 2025, 11:12 PM In this article I will make a case for the following argument: Donald Trump should win the next Nobel Peace Prize. This claim rests upon a premise: The tradition of autocracy is steeped in autocrats being awarded or awarding themselves meaningless accolades. Let’s, then, Dear Reader, make a case for this premise. This tradition of autocracy is rich. It sometimes involves sports. Mao Zedong’s 1966 swim in the Yangtze River near Wuhan was highly publicized.