Just Sarah

I try not to have many regrets about my life but it's impossible to have absolutely none. If it's possible I look for what I've learned from the experience. It helps with some of my issues but not all of them, still though I wonder what I would say to myself at the age of 18 if I had the chance? I would first say that if I should get pregnant, it's my decision on what happens to my body and baby. Society may say one thing but it's not terrible to be a single mom.

When my depression hits me first thing in the morning. I have no desire to get out of bed today. This feeling is all too familiar and I have been doing my best to keep myself grounded. The last week or so I've been having way more intrusive thoughts and I kept thinking of different ways I could hurt myself. I don't know why I keep fighting to live a lonely, depressing life either.

I used to love summer. Swimming, 4th of July, staying out past the street light coming on, camping trips etc. Now it feels like another harsh reminder of what life used to be like for me. Since I was a little kid the summer was always my favorite time of year. I was taught to swim very early on and spent most of my time in the pool. The 4th of July was always spent with family friends and our neighbors and there would be a huge block party that would last till sundown.