ABSTRACT Delivering ethical collaborative research is challenging, requiring disruption of assumptions, academic norms, and ways of working – including long-standing power dynamics. This article proposes a framework to support critical reflection on participatory practice; an adaptation of the wheel of consent. The adapted ‘ILBR’ framework explores the balance of who Initiates (makes requests/offers), does Labour (the action), gets Benefits, and takes on Risks (ILBR) in the conduct of research.