T. J. McCormack

That girl. Oh my goodness that girl. The one who makes you goofy and stumble over the words in your mouth and trip over nothing. That girl is the reason a boy lives, and the bane of his existence as well. Do you understand the guts it takes to tell that girl ... anything? The planning? The leap of faith? I’m sweating just remembering! There is a young boy in Florida who took that leap of faith recently, and has fallen victim to the absurdity which is zero tolerance.

So Playboy is no longer going to publish photos of fully nude women. Next, Nabisco will announce that Oreos will no longer contain a creme center, and the apocalypse may commence… Seriously though, this is a truly ponderous decision on the part of Hugh Hefner, and one which certainly points to a shift America will soon regret.

The Obama administration has raised the art of doublespeak to pretzel making. In case you missed it, the president’s team put out an advisory Thursday about holding deconfliction talks with Russia. What the heck? I’m normally pretty good at this stuff, but deconfliction? Apparently Gwyneth Paltrow is consulting the Obama administration’s communications office.