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@mehpatrol — 2,315 followers, 4,501 tweets

May 25, 2017

Looks like it's officially Katy Perry Hot Take Season https://t.co/Ci0vZsbiSV

May 25, 2017

For the record, none of you inquired about the raw chicken. (I'm fine now, thank you.)

May 24, 2017

I mean, who hasn't wept at the Apple Store at midnight?

May 24, 2017

Ok it's bad enough that I have to go to the 24-hour Apple Store. Nobody tell me who won "Survivor," please.

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